29 Year Old Toddler

Melissa McCarthy

2011-11-05T16:03:00.001-07:00

Addy just saw this magazine cover and asked if it was me. LOL. I do love me some Melissa McCarthy, so I guess that's a good thing.

DISNEYLAND - DAY 2 (finally)!!!

2011-10-28T06:10:00.017-07:00

To start off today's festivities, please enjoy a little early morning video from Addy. Doesn't she look hung over? I swear we were not drinking the night before.

On Day 2 we were joined by our friend Mandy and her family (who also let us crash at their house), which included Mandy's 4 year old daughter, Sydney. Ohhh was Addy ever in heaven to have a friend, and especially ANOTHER friend named Sydney (this is her 3rd).

I tried to start the day off with something less traumatic than the first day, so Finding Nemo Submarine was stop #1. Survey says: kids loved, mom not as much. One of many taken for the team.

Hallelujah for the multiple adults thing again, because I got to hit my favorites - Space Mountain and Indiana Jones, both with Ethan. Maybe I'm getting old, but I.J. was way more exciting than I remembered. Space Mountain, on the other hand, scared the pants off me. The ride was the same, but they made some changes for Halloween to the images projected inside and they were terrifying! Maybe I'm a wimp, but giant red floating skeleton heads popping up while I whiz by at 60 mph tend to make me nervous.

Another fun Halloween change was the Haunted Mansion. AWESOME!!! This ride seems like it's always closed when I go to Disneyland, so I was thrilled it was open. And holy cow, amazing!!

Of course, we had to hit the Teacups again - this pic shows Addy looking a little nervous about riding with all the boys, so she hopped into our cup right after this was taken.

It's a Small World was a HOOT with these two! Sidenote - Sydney does not have a gold tooth - that's popcorn.

As you can see, these girls thought IASW was the best thing EVER!! Seriously, I thought they were going to climb out of the boat and hug all the puppets. I also quite enjoyed myself because it's a LONG ride and was a nice little chance for me to change my shoes (yes, I switched shoes), enjoy some Diet Coke, send some texts, and basically sit in a stupor for 10 minutes.

Not as big of a hit was Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. I sort of knew this would happen going in, but it was the only ride in Fantasyland that had less than a 25 minute wait, so there it is. Here's the classic group pic: Tyler, Connor, Mandy, me, Sydney, Addy, Cassy, and Ethan.

We trekked back to California Adventure and Ethan and I went on the River Run with some hilarious little Japanese girls and their dad. Next time I won't wear jeans on this ride.

Our only major mishap of the day was losing Sydney for about 20 minutes inside the Redwood Creek Challenge Trail. Apparently (this happened while Ethan and I were getting soaked on the river) Sydney is a jungle cat and blew Addy out of the water with her climbing skills on the ropes course. She got to the top and took off before Cassy could catch up with her, but luckily we found her before we had to shut down the entire park.

This is Addy meeting Russell (from the movie Up).

Heimlich's Chew Chew Train at Bug's Land. I know I complained about other rides being boring, but this one wins not only the most boring, but also the shortest ride ever award. I swear it was 7 seconds long.

Last stop was the Tower of Terror. And no, I did not take Addy on this. The funnest part of the whole thing was waiting in line, and getting laughed at by Ethan while I peed my pants in suspense. OK not literally, but it was close. Even being wheeled into the operating room for a C-section was not as scary as getting on that ride. The ride itself was also pretty darn terrifying...at one point I couldn't tell if we were going up or down or east or west or what but it was crazy. CRAZY!!. My blood pressure stayed at approx. 200/120 for at least 15 minutes after it was over. What a rush!

And that, you will be grateful to know, concludes our Disneyland travelogue. What a totally wonderful and magical vacation! It was so fun watching Addy experience everything Disney for the first time. I just loved it. And it was SO cute watching Addy with my Cassy and Ethan. She really misses out on a lot of good family time living so far away, so it was great for her to have a little bonding time with her auntie and cousin. Love you guys!!!!

DISNEYLAND!!! DAY 1

2011-10-25T11:37:00.014-07:00

Be still your beating heart! I bloggeth!

If anything deserves a blog post, it's definitely Disneyland (although I just realized that apparently the birth of my son didn't warrant one - yikes). This last weekend, Addy and I took a mommy-daughter trip to Disneyland!! And yes, I am a mean wife and left Ammon at home with Emmett, poor man. We met up with my sister Cassy and nephew Ethan at the airport and stayed with our fabulous friend, Mandy.

Disneyland was super fun and fancy for Halloween! But note to everyone - it was pretty darn busy. I wouldn't necessarily recommend it as the best time of year to go.

As soon as we had a chance, I let Addy pick out a pair of Mickey ears, and of course, of all the Princess paraphernalia available, these are the ones she chose...

My daughter is so not a girly girl, and honestly...thank heavens. Some mom told me on the way out of the park that she paid $230 for her daughter to get a dress and her hair done (which consisted of a hairpiece that I swear had once been home to a flock of pigeons)...and she said it like it was such a bargain!

Our other California friend, Lisa, and her family joined us for Day 1 of Disney. Addy's FIRST RIDE ever at Disneyland was Autopia. She loved it.

Next we hit the Matterhorn, which I was SO excited for. This pic is waiting in line, where our friend Benjamin picked a little flower for Addy. Results on her first rollercoaster: not good. There was a lot of eye covering and screams of "make it stop!!"

Teacups - one of my personal faves, and thankfully not scary after the Matterhorn.

I took Addy and Lisa's daughter, Megan, on Dumbo and the Carousel while the older kids did something scary. Note - the Carousel is a motorized sedative. Be sure to bring your caffeine. After touring Sleeping Beauty's castle, Addy had her first Disneyland Churro. You must understand that this was a momentous experience (for me anyway), since I still remember my first one, also enjoyed at age 5. Note - Disneyland Churro's are NOT the same as Costco Churro's. Disneyland Churros are much, much better, and have 12 calories!

Apparently, I did not get the blaring "Addy is not ready for rollercoasters" message after her Matterhorn experience, and we went on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad anyway. I spent the 45 minutes in line (in blaring sun near some really pushy Portguese ladies) convincing her that"Fast is fun". This was our mantra as we were buckling in... "Fast is fun, Fast is Fun!", and as soon as the train started picking up speed, Addy quickly changed to "Fast is NOT FUN!!! Tell them to stop!!!!!"

Oy. That was an award winning Bad Mom moment - especially since she wisely tried to back out at the last minute and I wouldn't let her. I did not stand in that blasted line for nothing!!

I don't know if it was the speed or the noise or what, but apparently this girl is NOT ready for rollercoasters. I am seriously disappointed. I was so hoping my daughter would share my love for speed and adrenaline. Although, she is only 5. Perhaps I need to lower my expectations.

May I just insert my opinion here that Disneyland should never be attempted with less than 3 adults? Unless your idea of pure Disneyland bliss is rotating between It's a Small World and Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, you will want to participate in some kid swapping. It was SO DREAMY to experience all the magical and cute little kid things with Addy, and all the scary stuff with my nephew Ethan and the other kids. He and I went on Star Tours together, which I wisely realized Addy would NOT enjoy - it was great, but seriously nausea inducing.

Dinner at California Adventure with Ethan:

The whole front entrance of California Adventure is under construction, which means that to get anywhere, you have to walk the whole length of the park one direction, and then back again. I swear it was a mile. BUT, I got to go on California Screamin' which was AWESOME and worth any amount of walking. That rollercoaster RULES!

C.A. was closing early for a show, so we trekked the mile BACK to Disneyland to hit a few more rides before Addy's bones pooped out (as she put it).

Ethan and I did Splash Mountain while Addy went on Winnie the Pooh with Cassy. By that point, it was getting late and dark and I think her nerves were shot. She didn't enjoy it.

To avoid a little walking time at the end of the night, we decided to take the Disneyland train back around to the front entrance. Here comes Mom mistake #2 - I thoughtfully warned Addy ahead of time about the fake but slightly scary dinosaurs we would pass by on the way, and she had a GINORMOUS meltdown. Sobbing, crying, pleading, begging, etc. ANYTHING to not go on the train. THE TRAIN. You know, that really super slow "ride" that goes all the way around the park in a speedy 40+ minutes? Yes, that is what terrified her most about our day at Disneyland.

By promising to plug her ears for her the whole way (which I did), we managed to wrestle Addy onto THE TRAIN, and made it safely, and with no dinosaur attacks, back to the main gate. She conked out on the way, and my heroic sister carried her almost all the entire way back to our hotel.

We stayed in a hotel just for that night, but it was SO WORTH it. Addy thought it was a marvel and proclaimed "This is my favorite hotel EVER!!!!" Day 1 down.

The Party is Over.

2011-05-31T12:50:00.012-07:00

So, Ammon went back to school today after being off for almost a month. A month! You can really get settled into a new version of your life in a month. Having him tell me to pull out my earplugs today at 6:30am was PAINFUL. As was realizing I was out of Diet Coke with no car (have no fear, we walked to the gas station a few blocks away).

Anyway, we had a great time having him home even if we didn't do anything more exciting than go to the Rec Ctr. Emmett had his first pool experience, which he seemed to like and was pretty cute until he threw up in the pool. Ah well. That's what chlorine is for, no? We got TONS of projects done, which has made me feel a little more organized and a little less tense. Having an almost daily nap helped too. =)

I realized today that I have given almost no updates on Emmett! He is 8 1/2 months old now and such a squishy love!!!! I want to just eat him up all the time. He is squealing to himself in his exersaucer right now, and it is so adorable. He is eating all his unappetizing-looking "solids" with great gusto, and thinks it's really funny when he sneezes and sprays peas all over Mommy's face.

He LOVES his sister and thinks she is hilarious. He giggles and goos every time he sees her, and she is so sweet with him. Is there anything more precious than seeing your children love each other? He rolls pretty well now, but still can't sit on his own because the child has no butt and an enormous belly. This doesn't make for good balancing.

He really is a delightful and easygoing baby. We are quite lucky. Don't get me wrong...he has his opinions and is not afraid to share them, but most of the time he is fabulous.

These pics are totally out of order and I'm too lazy to sort them:

Emmett on Easter Sunday, and enjoying some green beans last week.

Addy snuggling Emmett around Christmastime (hence the blanket), and one of Emmett's finer moments:

This was during one of the days I was teaching preschool in Jan/Feb.

Getting a little Vitamin D time over the winter.

Enjoying some more green beans. Or peas.

Dance Recital!!

2011-05-02T11:33:00.012-07:00

Addy's first (and likely last) dance recital was on Saturday night, and oh my heavens, she was a hoot. Between the thumbs ups, finger pointing, and random spastic moves, she was a STAR. Not a born dancer, mind, but a star nonetheless. I honestly don't think she hit the right move at the right time once, bless her sweet heart. *Note to self: if you forget your choreography, just shake it (she did some serious butt shimmies during the dress rehearsal).

For a variety of reasons, each class ended up doing their number a total of FOUR times. This particular video is Round 2 and is by far her funniest. Although I wish you could see Round 4...anyone age 5 or under basically just stood on the stage looking like they were in shock. Or else heavily sedated.

Addy starts off on the back row, 2nd one from the left. Please ignore my cackling in the background.

By the way, I just showed her this video and told her she did awesome. Her response: "Oh it was nothing. Why were you laughing in the video?"

Insomnia, again.

2011-05-02T04:10:00.002-07:00

Why is it that I only blog when I'm unable to sleep? Am I turning vampire-like into a creature of the night? Although that title sounds vaguely "escort-ish" so we'll leave it alone. I've got to start writing comprehensible things during normal daylight hours or you will all start gathering for an intervention of some sort, I am sure.

Anyway. As Awesome-Wife-Number-One (I claim that title for today only), I slept on the couch because Ammon's last day of finals is today, and apparently, I snore. Rather loudly. Or at least I did last night and interfered with his R.E.M. sleep, which is a crime in our house punishable by communication exclusively via grunts and excessive glaring. So I Took One For the Team (mine) and slept quite comfortably on our Furniture Row Beauty until about 45 minutes ago when I woke up with my nostrils pressed into the cushions, my leg thrown over the top (and asleep), and my neck in what felt like a post-mortem contortion.

So, I rolled over and started "thinking" which went something like this: "Oh man, I am going to be so tired tomorrow. I wonder if I can get a nap at some point. But I do need to get preschool ready which means I have to clean the house oh shoot I haven't done any laundry and Emmett is out of clothes I wonder if this new formula is helping. He still seems to be spitting up a ton but he's so cute oh nuts I haven't posted any pics of him, like, ever and I really should and I need to post pics of Addy's recital too man that was funny. I sure hated dance when I did it, but my friends seemed to like it and I wonder what happened to Friend X? Man I was so jealous of her in high school I should teach a YW lesson on jealousy sometime (this thought followed by 20 minutes of planning said lesson from start to finish - even though I'm not in YW or have been asked to teach, ever)...holy hannah I just planned a YW lesson, I am losing it maybe I should blog?"

And so I got up and here is the fruit of my nuttiness. Don't you find your train of thought when you can't sleep totally INSANE? I love that I can start thinking about napping and end up writing fictional lessons to kids I don't teach or have any authority over whatsoever. I am without calling, which is like being without country, but maybe not so much?

OK I'm tired again. Going to try to get a little nap in before kids wake up. And by the way, you people out there that get up at 5am ON PURPOSE are also INSANE. Loves! =)

A night in the life of Emmett the Nugget and his sad, sad mother

2011-03-17T00:08:00.005-07:00

No one should blog at 1am while they're baby has been screaming for an hour after having recently taken an Ambien, most especially me. But, as you'll see from my FB posts I threw in here, I just couldn't leave this glorious and joyful night undocumented.

Here it is, starting at around 12:30ish:

Is there anything suckier than listening to your baby cry themselves to sleep? The sleeping part hasn't happened yet and I just want to cave, but I know this is what he needs. ARGH.

16 minutes ago ·
and the longer I sit here, the more Cadbury Mini Eggs I stress-eat. Dang you Cadbury. Dang you.

14 minutes ago

And now of course, the little stinker is asleep, and I'm all kinds of keyed from chocolate overconsumption and stress and will probably not sleep at all tonight.

14 minutes ago

Keyed UP I meant to say. Oh for the love.

And...I lied. Back to screaming. I love my life I love my life I love my life. Sorry for the running commentary, but this night of fun must be documented.

9 minutes ago

And starting here is where I decided to give FB a rest (my junior high math teacher probably doesn't care much about this. I'm only speculating? Maybe she does):

1:06 - Intermittent yelping. Sort of like the sound a car turning over. RRrrrrrrrraaaaaaarr. Rrrrrrraaaaaaar. OK that is not even CLOSE to what he sounds like.

1:08 - Giant scream/squawk/bark/snort, and....silence.

1:08 - I spent 60 seconds of that time trying every way I could think to spell squawk before I gave up and looked it up.

1:11 - Still silent.

1:21 - Still silent. Have I subdued the beast for good? Gads I hope so, but seriously, I am totally wide awake now. I may be typing incoherent nonsense, but hey - it is ALERT incoherent nonsense. Funny how it's now 1:23 because I had to spend so much time thinking about how to spell all those big words.

1:23 - So. I managed to put down the bag of mini-eggs (yeah me), and I've already played like 5 games of Mah-Jong. Online shopping?

1:28 - I have enough wits to realize that making any purchasing decisions in my present state has never produced positive results. Although...that's not strictly true. My Super Slim Shaper, which is the best little fat sucking number I've ever tried, was purchased at just such a moment. Who knows what glorious things could show up on my door in a few days?

1:30 - I wonder if tomorrow I will blame Ammon for eating such a huge amount of Mini-Eggs. Probably. And I will read this post and be heartily embarrassed. But right now it's just fun to see how long it takes me to fix all my spelling errors with my eyes crossed.

1:31 - Bless the child he is still asleep. Shoot though - I just saw a lot of head movement in the monitor. Yes, we have a video monitor, but it was really cheap and Emmett looks kind of like a fuzzy turtle on it.

1:33 - Why am I sitting here in the dark? It's not like the 'lektricty quits working at our house after 10pm. OK now I am just blathering about absolutely nothing. And starting to write in the same voice as a character from one of the books I'm reading.

Shoot damn. I best get m'sef on up to bed.

Now I have really lost it. I'm sorry you had to witness this, you mysterious intrepid readers. I'm not necessarily going to bed, but I really think this post needs to end.

Goodnight! and hopefully you have a laugh at my expense tomorrow! Today! St Paddy's Day!

Christmas Letter

2010-12-19T14:40:00.002-07:00

This is for those of you who I forgot to send a Christmas card to, or who just didn't get a letter in your card. =)

Merry Christmas!

You will notice I combined our baby announcement with our Christmas card this year…please don’t judge. It was my goal to have a delightful picture of all four of us looking happy, rested, and attractive, but that shot is still a few months out. We’ve been a wee bit busy…

2010 was typical for our family, in that we decided to have multiple life altering events happen at once. What is wrong with us?

After many lengthy discussions, we decided that Ammon needed to go back to school to finish his PhD in physics, and he started in September. It’s been a little rough so far, but he has been happy to have intelligent conversations during his work day again. In addition to taking classes, he also teaches an undergraduate lab and is TA for another class. I help Ammon out where I can – recording grades and even grading essays (I weep for our youth’s English skills). No, I don’t help him with his homework. Every assignment looks to me like aliens wrote it.

Obviously our biggest event has been adding Emmett James to our family a mere 2 weeks after Ammon started school. Our timing is impeccable. Oh he is so yummy! No surprise to anyone, pregnancy was sheer torture for me. Luckily, things went a little better this time around and Emmett was only born 6 weeks early (as opposed to Addy’s 8.5). He spent one week in the NICU, which was also a nice change from Addy’s 5 week stay.

It’s hard to tell much about his personality so far – babies at this age pretty much just lie there – but he does seem to be pretty mellow and easy going. For the most part, he’s a really good sleeper. He’s smiling now and just started laughing a few days ago. So far his most endearing trait is that he snorts like an angry piglet when he’s mad. I know I shouldn’t laugh when my child is upset, but it is beyond adorable.

Addy is our verbal girl, and at 4, she is sounding like a mini adult. Some gems from this year include: “I had a double blast-off toot!”, and “Mom, I’m growing hair in my armpits!” (not actually true). Yesterday’s went like this: Addy: “I’m a genius!” Mom: “You are?” Addy: “Of course I am! Why would I be dumb?” Why indeed. She has been loving preschool again this year and has also started taking dance. It looks a little spastic sometimes, but it’s still cute. Other than preschool and dance, her favorite pastimes are pretending to be a puppy, a lion, a kitty, a jaguar, and…pretty much any kind of animal, complete with soundtrack.

She is such a sweet big sister. She loves to sing to Emmett to calm him, and frequently prays “that Emmett will stop crying soon and get big so he can play with me”. She is slowing recovering from the only-child worldview that life revolves around her. It’s been a slightly painful adjustment.

As for me, I didn’t accomplish a whole lot this year, other than…oh yes, I had a child. I suppose 8 months of gestating is enough work for anyone? I am ridiculously thrilled to feel healthy again! I’m slowly adjusting to my new life as mother of two and wife to a student. I’m finding that as long as I have book club and plenty of excuses for girls’ night out, I do pretty well. And if I get a nap.

It’s been kind of a grueling year, but it has also given us the chance to witness countless miracles in our lives. We have been enormously blessed each step of the way. We are so grateful for a kind Father in Heaven who knows and loves us, and for His Son, Jesus Christ.

With love,

Micaela and family

So it begins...

2010-03-13T23:52:00.002-07:00

You know I must have something momentous to share if I'm actually taking the time to blog, and I do.......I'M PREGNANT!! I'm 9 weeks along right now, and the little nugget is due Oct 20.
As you can imagine, all possible emotions have made an appearance in the last few weeks since I found out, and most within the first 15 seconds: elation, joy, TERROR, excitement, HORRIFICATION (is this a word?), instant desire to be sick and to go baby shopping all at once.
If any of you have read back to the begininning annals of this blog (or have had had a conversation with me lasting more than 48 seconds), you already know that Pregnancy #1; aka The HORROR did not go so super smooth. In any possible way.
According to experts (so far anyway), chances are pretty darn good that Pregnancy #2 will be muuuuuuch better. So, say a little prayer for meeeeeeeeeeeeeee! (I'm hearing Kris and Meggan on backup there).

Anywho. Hear are my preliminary thoughts on Pregnance #2, aka PII:

Cons:
1. The obvious. I promise not to give you a detailed list of every gross thing that has or will happen to my body. Suffice it to say: constant state of carsickness/I must have just had the bad shrimp x 24/7 = not such a perky girl.
2. Interesting twist here...I REALLY am trying to avoid being annoying pregnant girl that whines and moans incessantly, because frankly, I knew what I was getting myself into and that's just not fun for anyone to listen to. Except your husband. That's his job. The problemo lies in the bitter irony that if I Put On My Happy Face TOO much, then no one will feel sorry for me and offer to watch my kid/do my calling/bring me cottage cheese. Must persevere and find the balance!
3. The elusive hunt for the exact perfect right thing to eat at the exact right moment. I explained it this way to Ammon: it's sort of like believing that you can find the end of the rainbow...you know it's there, you can see where it ends! But every time you think you've found it...Poof! It was never there. It's as though all pregnant women (well, OK, me) believe that when you're feeling sick, there really IS that certain miracle food out there if you could just THINK OF IT!!!!! And if you think of, how quickly can you get there??????!!!!!!!!!!!!! The saddest part is that even if you think of it and manage to order it and get it in front of you, chances of it making all your dreams come true are nano-slim. I made this very mistake on Thurs night - I had a light shine down from heaven saying QDOBA!!!! So I hauled the fam over there, ordered the chicken taco salad (you women that have been pregnant already see my fatal error), took a bite.......and nothing. Worse than nothing. Blech. Note to self!!!!! DO NOT ORDER CHICKEN WHEN PREGNANT. IT ONLY SOUNDS GOOD IN THEORY.

Pros:
1. If Addy is any indication (and I am praying my little heart out that she is) of how cute my next child could be, then we have obvious Pro #1.
2. I think that PI aka The HORROR did a real number on Ammon's psyche because the man has done a complete 180 since round 1. Seriously, he has done EVERYthing the last few weeks while I moan on the couch (I'm allowed at home, just not in public). He has been a superstar, a rockstar and all of the above.
3. The deliciously rare moment in the first trimester when you actually find the pot of gold - the perfect food at the perfect moment. Mine was several weeks ago in the form of a roast beef sandwich from Panera with horseradish. LLLLlllaaaaaaaa angels singing I just ate something divine!!!!! Ironically, I went back the next day to try and recreate the moment, and blech. It's go to be at the RIGHT TIME.

I'm sure more to come later. In the meantime, wish me luck!!!

The New Crafty-Me

2009-12-07T15:47:00.010-07:00

I don't know what has happened to me since I quit working over a year ago....I swear I've had a personality shift: I stopped blogging regularly, I hardly shop at all now (although that's just circumstantial I'm sure), and I've discovered I looooooove being crafty! I seriously never knew this about myself.

So the house isn't any cleaner, I don't cook any more often, but I have made some fun things over the last year...a Halloween wreath, several Advent calendars, a jute vase, pillows, Christmas yarn balls, been in a cardmaking club (which I NEVER thought I would do), decoupaged a drawer pull, spraypainted and painted almost every piece of furniture/accessory I own, hosted a Scrapbooking weekend, started digital scrapbooking, and on and on and on. Poor Ammon. Early in our marriage, he had lots of hobbies to keep himself occupied, and once told me that he wished I had some hobbies I enjoyed as well...I really don't think this was what he had in mind. =)

My latest, or at least most involved project has been making Scrabble-tile necklaces. I LOVE doing these! It's fun to look at a piece of paper and visualize what you could make out of it. They really are nothing fancy pants at all, but, I did recently display them at a craft fair, and they did quite well! Who knew??

Anywho. So now I have dozens left (because I can't do anything in small doses) with no home. OK, I really never thought I'd do this, so here goes really fast:

I'm-selling-my-cute-little-pendants-for-$5-each-they-come-with-ribbon-or-$2-extra-for-metal-chain.

That was awkward. You'd never know that I used to work in sales would you? lol. But what the heck. Maybe there is some reader out there who just can't live without a necklace, and seriously...what am I going to do with all these? =)

As you can see, I've shown a bunch of samples of ones I've made already - be gentle - our camera sucks, and my photoshopping skills are nil. I've already done several custom necklaces, so if there's a certain monogram or color you want I can do basically anything. Just comment on here if you want to buy one, or 7. They make great stocking stuffers!

Family Pics

2009-12-05T21:57:00.007-07:00

We FINALLY had family pictures taken! This is the literally the first one we've done of all us since Addy was born. Isn't that sad? Ah well. Here they are!

This one just cracked me up. I have no clue what we're doing:

How cute is she?

My two little loves!

Halloween 2009

2009-11-30T15:23:00.004-07:00

Alright, so I'm a month late, what can I say? I asked Addy about two months before H day what she wanted to be (big mistake - don't ask until they are at least 12), and she said a clown. I REALLY really hate clowns, so I figured this would only happen if I could make it look like something I could tolerate. So I get all crafty and excited and finished her skirt when she says....she doesn't want to be a clown anymore. Of course. Luckily, she's only 3 and very impressionable, so I told her she wasn't just a clown, she was a Clown PRINCESS. Worked like a charm. Hooray for gullible kids!

I LOVE me some Muppets!!!!

2009-11-25T16:48:00.003-07:00

If you don't just die laughing watching this, I will never understand your sense of humor. =) Especially Animal.....this is for you, Cassy!!

I am no June.

2009-09-30T19:07:00.007-07:00

Hello campers. Today, I would like to discuss ovens. Yes, I realize that I have not blogged in months, and this may seem like an ill chosen topic, but hey - it's my blog.

Today, for reasons that will (theoretically) be discussed in a subsequent post, I have literally been cleaning my house for TEN HOURS. I kid you not. It has taken more Diet Coke and candy corn than you can possibly conceive. Not to mention that yesterday I cleaned for...wait...what day was yesterday? I seriously cannot remember. Oh yes - Tuesday. I cleaned for 7 hours on Tues and 3 on Monday. And, I'm not done yet. Never before and never again has/will this house been/be so magnificently sparkly.
I am just so overwhelmed with self congratulatory feelings right now that I really have to share them with you. So far, I have:
Dusted, washed windows, scrubbed toilets, cleaned showers/sinks, wiped down doors and doorknobs, vacuumed, cleaned carpets (including stairs), moved furniture, killed bugs, made something crafty, scrubbed out the trash can (not kidding), wiped down windowsills, done countless loads of laudry, scrubbed Ammon's hideous lazyboy (3 times cause the first time I used too much soap and made it crunchy), wiped baseboards, stripped sheets and put up Halloween decorations. AND I'M STILL NOT DONE. I am amazing.

OK back to ovens. So, for those of you that have an oven (I assume that's most of you reading this), does it have a self cleaning feature? And do you use it regularly? What a wonderful invention. Now do any of you have a double oven? If so, does it have the self cleaning feature on the 2nd oven also? BECAUSE MINE DOES NOT AND I'M VERY UNHAPPY ABOUT IT.
In my Diet Coke induced cleaning frenzy, I was Windexing the outside of the ovens when I happened to peek inside and thought to myself "Self, good job on setting the self clean yesterday. This makes your life wonderful and complete. Now self, let's just double check the bottom oven...". I won't tell you what came out of my mouth at that moment, but it wasn't pretty, nor was the oven.
Eee gads you have never seen such a mound of disgusting yuckified grossness. Honestly, did I blow up a jar of honey and then pour 6 lbs of bacon grease on top with a halibut chaser? Cause that's what it looked like.
Anyway, the point is that it was really nasty. The oven and I did battle for over 40 minutes, at which point I threw in the towel i.e. pair of rubber gloves (that I'm kind of upset about having to chuck because I got them for free with a coupon and I'm sort of attached) and called the fight in favor of the oven. Granted, the nastiness is now confined to a 6" diameter circle in the middle rather than the entire bottom half, so I had a small measure of success. As for that 6" circle, I don't know how that goo is holding on. Either it's made of an adhesive found only in hell and in my oven, or it has actually developed it's own consciousness and is hanging on by sheer force of will. Either way, I give up and I'm going to go have some poptarts. I think I've earned them.

**Sidenote - Ammon just got home and when I told of my Battle with the Oven, here was his response: "Ummm, yeah. You are looking a little greazzzzy. You might want to go look in the mirror". Love.

Nina and Evan

2009-08-21T12:41:00.002-07:00

I know I'm behind on blogging about my own life and my own child, but I had to post this adorable and hilarious video of my bro-in-law Evan (my sis Lindsay's husband) singing with/to my squishy niece, Nina. Enjoy!

Nina and Daddy Singing from Lindsay MacDonald on Vimeo.

I am getting OLD! Old I say!!!

2009-07-09T19:28:00.004-07:00

OK, it's not my birthday QUITE yet (*july 16*). But, in light of the fact that I will be spending my birthday camping in a field in the wilderness of UT, and then driving 8 hours in the car with a whiny three-year old, I've decided to start my celebrating early. As in right now.
So, HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! To ME! In 7 short days, I will be 33. Incidentally, it is my Mom's actual birthday today. Happy birthday Mom! Speaking of old...(*cough* 65).

I went and got birthday present #1 today, which was a lovely pedicure. Birthday present #2 will be riding the alpine slides at Park City on Sat, and birthday present #3 will be consuming as much Cafe Rio as is humanly possible in a 48 hour time period.
The only other thing that I covet and just cannot justify anymore now that I am not working, is this:

The most blessed mascara ever created. I am absolutely certain that angels mixed the mysterious ebony goop this is made of. Sadly, it is not to be. Since I am officially banned (by myself, NOT the authorities. Sheesh! Who do you think I am?) from setting foot in Nordstrom's, I can only dream of having eyelashes like Cher in her "If I Could Turn Back Time" video. Someday I'll be able to afford ridiculously expensive makeup again. Does that sound bad? Bah.

Nostalgia

2009-06-13T23:14:00.002-07:00

I am having the WORST attack of nostalgia tonight!! I don't know where this is coming from - the fact that I'm still getting very little sleep (see previous post), or that it's summer, or what, but all of the sudden, I REALLY miss my college life. Does anyone else go through this, or is it just me? Don't get me wrong - I LOVE my family and my life. But you know. It's just different.

So, humor me and read my list of things I miss most about college life:

I miss sleeping in and missing my 8, or 9, or 10 o'clock class.
I miss eating in the cafeteria and watching my friend Amber laugh so hard that pudding came out of her nose.
I miss walking across campus, feeling so awesome and cool because I am a COLLEGE student and I have places to be and things to do.
I miss having Cassy have to walk 3 miles to my boyfriend's house at 2am because she was locked out.
I miss rollerblading in Provo Canyon.
I miss Janiece yelling at me to get off the phone.
I miss Janiece and Jessica fighting.
I miss singing at the top of my lungs in a car full of girls.
I miss hiking Orderville Canyon with Janiece and Jamie, and sleeping on the church lawn, and getting the sprinklers turned on at 4 am.
I miss rolling out of bed at noon to find Diana in the kitchen, having just rolled out of bed too.
I miss watering our garden in the middle of the night.
I miss that Outdoor Rec class I took during winter where I puked on a hike.
I miss getting asked out on a date by PETE my super duper dream guy.
I miss fighting and making up with my BFF Steve Bugby.
I miss spending the night outside temple square to get tickets for the solemn assembly.
I miss having our own Academy Awards with Brigham.
I miss lipstick wars with Jeff and Shannon in the day room.
Sorry, Ammon - but I also miss first kisses. Especially ones that happened unexpectedly, or in odd places.
I miss Diana's couch.
I miss going to classes and being SO excited by something I was learning.
I miss all the great spiritual experiences I had in college.
I miss running around the HFAC after it had closed.
I miss BYU mint brownies.
I miss Movies 8.
I miss cramming for a test hours before and then getting an A anyway.
I miss having my sister as my roommate and having her laugh at all the little daily things.
I miss falling asleep in the library.
I miss Janiece and Jessica's cooking.
I miss running into people I knew on campus.
I miss yelling at my roommates upstairs to shut up.
I miss awesome Utah snow.
I miss all the freaking delicious food there was to eat around campus.
I miss coming home from class, popping in a movie for 20 mins and eating cottage cheese with saltines.
I miss cute old Dr. Scoresby and Dr. Robinson's classes.
I miss talking all night with friends and wondering if we'll ever get married. =)

I'M FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-09T14:49:00.007-07:00

OK, I didn't want to do this post prematurely, lest you all witness "Falling Off the Wagon - Part Deux", but I think we've passed the danger zone...

You read right...I am free from drugs!!! I have officially gone 11 days with no Ambien!!!! Eleven!! I'M CURED!!!! I know this may seem like no big thang, but this is HUGE for me, and I must say, I am a proud little chicken right now. After having had to take a sleeping pill every night for just over three years now, I am mightily impressed with myself at being able to quit.

Amidst all my self congratulations, I must, however, be honest and admit that the impetus for this decision was not exclusively due to on my own indomitable self will. More like, the will of my doctor not being willing to refill my prescription and not being able to go back and see said doctor for a new one. But WHO CARES??? I am free, I am free and I don't care who knows it!!!!

Of course, I have been really tired and have been consuming vast (even for me) quantities of the DC - but all before 3pm.

***Brief but necessary shout out to DC: I love you. I could not live without you. You are my rock and my sweet, sweet nectar. You give me strength when I want to hide under the couch cushions. You give me tantalizing deliciousness when I need something to keep me from the brownies. And thank you, Ronald McDonald, for making the most mouth watering blend of Diet Coke known to man or beast.

Moving on. Sleep-wise, it's been a rough 11 days. Some nights I've not gotten to sleep until 4 or 5 am - last night it was about 1am which is a very big improvement. It's been challenging to say the least, but I'm really relieved. I starting to feel like a real person again.

Here are some of the Pro's of being off the goods:

I've learned that I can actually deal with less sleep than I thought I could (good to know if I ever have a baby that only nurses).
What they say about exercise really is true - it makes you sleep better. So hopefully one of the pro's will be a butt like Jessica Biel's. Or not.
Ability to remember the next day what happened on that show we watched the previous night. And to remember fact that I actually did watch said show. Or even remember that I watched TV.
No more random orders of Super Slim Shapers showing up in my mailbox from too much late night drugged up infomercial watching. Although - that was only in the beginning (see #2 below - the fun stuff wears off), and it was kind of fun anyway. And I LOVE my Super Slim Shaper.
No more nighttime Nutella binges.

Cons of being off the goods:

No more nighttime Nutella binges, or at least no legitimate excuses for having nighttime Nutella binges.
Less nighttime fun for Ammon. The goods made me slightly more....amorous. Although that was really just in the beginning (see: Addy).
No more using the "I can't get up in the night with Addy because I'll fall down the stairs" excuse. I actually did that once - it was only 2 stairs, but still.

Wow - I'm surprised those are the only cons I can think of. I sure loved my time on the drugs. Those were goooood times. But, it's time to move on. *Sniff*. So long, dear friend. You were a party in a pill and I will miss you and the delicious sleep I had while you were with me. Good heavens - isn't it a good thing I was raised LDS and never got into recreational drugs? That would not have been good.

Happy Birthday Armon!

2009-06-03T20:45:00.004-07:00

It's Ammon's 32nd birthday today (NOT 33rd like I told some of our friends - I am trying to prematurely age him)!!! So, in honor of Ammon, and because I didn't get the cute little book done I am still planning on making for him, I put together a little slideshow of Ammon's formative years. Enjoy!!!

I love you, my Mythical Unicorn (don't be alarmed...it's an inside joke)! Weeee! Happy Birthday!

Babies and Babies and Babies (and licenses)

2009-05-08T21:41:00.005-07:00

So, I don't know what in the sam blazes has been happening fertility-wise around here, but I swear to the high heavens I know 1100 babies born in the last several months, and at least another 746 on the way. It's amazing, in a good way, but in also a slightly disconcerting way. On the plus side: babies! Duh. So many yummy delicious baby rolls to squish! On the other hand, I'm not sure I want to think about either the really large coincidence it is that everyone I know seems to have kids at once, or the bizarre coordination effort that must have taken place to make this happen.
And, as you might expect, this makes my biological ticker (round 2) feel like one of those really annoying alarm clocks that just keep getting louder and louder until you get up, or throw it against the wall. No, not pregnant. Still in mortal terror of the idea, but REALLY starting to want a squishy little chunk of my own again. NOT a happy combo.

Anyway, I just wanted to give a Super Shout Out to all my new mom and expecting friends who had, or are having the following kidlets. In no particular order (thank you Samantha Harris for officially making that the most boring line ever read from a teleprompter):

Baby Boy Peterson (on the way)

Baby Girl Savage (on the way)

Elisabeth Louise

**Edited Baby BOY Siders (on the way)

Everett Roe

Baby ??? Lay

Rhys Vezzani (Ammon's sis)

Benji Gould (Ammon's other sis)

Baby Boy Johnson (Cousin Misty)

I just have to say how utterly baffling/amazing/insane/wonderful/(insert adjective of your choice here) the things that we go through to become mothers are. Stumpy toes, cankles, fickle birth moms, lame doctors, barfing, itching, heart burn, pant wetting, and excessive belly fat to name a few. And yet, we do it! The things that motherhood inspires you to do and to become are truly incredible. So good job moms!!!

And a little side note to end this post on....I am officially a LEGAL DRIVER AGAIN!!!! Hurrah!!! My suspended (NOT revoked) license was reinstated today, so now I can drive to Rock Springs at 2am if I so choose. Aaaaaaah the freedom.

CWAZY

2009-04-28T15:41:00.006-07:00

Oh sweet sanity. My lovely friend Anya let me dump Addy off about an hour ago before I went completely B-A-N-A-N-A-S. Poor kid. I've been saying a lot lately: "You are making me CRAZY!" (don't think I'm terrible - we are in potty training hell. I'm allowed to feel crazy), and she finally said "I so sorry Mommy. I sorry you cwazy". Oh precious little peanut.

So, I thought I'd use this blissful moment of peace and no pee messes to catch up a titch. As ever, I have way too much to say! Must compress.

First off - this was from today and was too cute. This kid wants to go to school so bad! She loves her "pack-pack" and insists on wearing it even though it's at least 11 sizes too big. Also note the fab shoes - Addy had a right of passage last week and got her feet measured at Nordstrom's where we bought her first "real" pair of athletic shoes.

Oh heck. It's 5pm and I really should go pick Addy up. Poor Anya has probably locked her in the closet by now. I'll have to continue later.

Booty

2009-04-16T14:31:00.004-07:00

Yes, yes, I know. It's been ages since I've blogged and I have way more important things to post, BUT. I just couldn't resist telling you about this little nugget first:

A few days ago, I bought the ever so delicious treat of the double bag of Pirate's Booty at Costco (if you haven't tried this yet, you must RUN out and get some post-haste). I've been slowly enjoying a few (or maybe 26) handfuls each evening as my little nighttime snack, which considering the temptation, is pretty restrained. I've known many a health nut to consume an entire Costco size bag in one sitting.

Anyway. I've been doing pretty good on rationing my PB out, when I noticed today the bag, entirely empty, lying on the floor at the bottom of the stairs.

"Oh CRAP", was my eloquent first thought. And then: "I've done it again. Another Ambien-addled brain run amok. I wonder if I ate the ham too...?".

Thankfully, I ate neither the bag of PB or the ham. It turns out Addy decided she needed some food storage in her room, consisting solely of Booty:

As you can see, she is extremely proud of her ingenuity, as am I. Providentliving.org would be so impressed.

I knew it.

2009-03-23T18:14:00.002-07:00

Your Personality Is Like Alcohol

You're the life of the party, a total flirt, and probably a pretty big jokester.

Sometimes your behavior gets you in trouble, but you still remain socially acceptable.

You're a pretty bad driver, and you're dancing could also use a little work!

At your best: You are uninhibited, funny, and relaxed.

What people like about being around you: You're friendly, welcoming, and easy to talk to.

What people dislike about being around you: You're a little sloppy and careless.

How addicted people get to you: A fair amount, though they tend to deny it.

What Drug Is Your Personality Like?

It's Saturday Night Liiiiiiiiiiiive! With your host, Adeline Reese Crapo!!

2009-03-14T19:55:00.005-07:00

I put Addy down for bed about 45 minutes ago, and everything was silent until the last 20 minutes or so when she apparently found her microphone and decided to express her feelings about bedtime over loudspeaker. So I'm sitting here surfing Craigslist, and this is the live feed of what I'm hearing:

8:41pm: "I am not going to bed anymoooooooooore!!! No more!! I won't do iiiiiiiiiiit!" sung to what sounds like the tune of Mamma Mia.
8:44pm: Yes, I was right. It was Mamma Mia. Now she is singing Mamma Mia. Not the correct lyrics of course, just the phrase over and over again in various pitches.
8:46pm: "Mommmmy. Micaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeela..."
8:47pm: Humming interrupted with violent (she's been sick all week) hacking and coughing directly into the mic. I almost wet my pants.
8:49pm: Muttering. Something about books and possibly pantyhose?
8:51pm: Strange banging. It's got to be either the microphone or her head against the bed. Hard to say.
8:56pm: Tuneless whining. Althought it does tend to go up and then back down in pitch, like a bell curve.
9:02pm: "neh neh neh neh. A BUG!!!!!!!!"
9:05pm: More bell curve whining.
9:09pm: It's been silent for 4 minutes....
9:11pm: Dang. Hacking followed by irritated mumbling. SO close.
9:13pm: Oh GADS. I think she's jumping on the bed. ******INTERVENTION FORTHCOMING. Daddy is listening at the door. Hold on - the jumping stops; Daddy moves away.
9:14pm: Silence. Perhaps Ammon's shadow was enough to quiet her down. Ah the power of intimidation.
9:15pm: Wrong again. "Mommmmy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommmmmmmy. Mommy".
9:16pm: Feet kicking. "BLEH" (hey I'm just recording what I hear).
9:21pm: Sad moaning. "Mommy!" Plaintive wailing. "Mama mommy mama!" I will be strong.
9:30pm: I caved. However, this turns out to have been the right move and she had (surprise) become uncovered from her blankets and was just too darn pooped to do anything about it. Hence the low grade whine. Anyway, she seems fine now.
9:39pm: Awwwww, sweet peace.

Addy's Room Redesign - HELP PLEASE!!

2009-03-12T08:46:00.011-07:00

Addy's 3rd birthday is coming up on April 3 (How did this kid make it to THREE??), and for her present, we are going to upgrade her into a "Big Girl" bed and room. Here's the pickle: she is certainly an opinionated kid, but she has no idea what she wants, so she's been completely useless in helping me figure out bedding/paint/etc. This is a plus of course because I get to pick whatever I want, but...I don't know what I want either!! I want to be sure it's cute and age appropriate, but something that will also last awhile - i.e. no Hannah Montana/Disney Princesses.

I'm posting below a few ideas I've had and I'm going to open up a voting poll. PLEASE VOTE!! I need other opinions!! I mostly looked at kids stores, so if you've seen bedding somewhere else that would be cute for a little toddler muffin, PLEASE send me a pic. I'm not totally in love with anything yet, so any new ideas would be most welcome. THANKS!!!! How about for the person that manages to find me the perfect bedding, I will bake some fab cupcakes of your choice...unless you live out of state.....then you just get my air kisses. Loves!

1. OWL #1 (drawback - this one is muy expensive so I could probably only get 1 piece - probably the quilt)

2. HAWAIIAN HIBISCUS (Ammon thinks this one would be ridiculous since we live in a land locked state. Eh??? Silly man.)

3. OWL #2 (cute, but not sure I'm in love with the color palette)

4. RED HAWAIIAN (fun, but what in the heck color do you paint a room to match this???)

5. FUNKY FLOWERS (certainly intersting, but too much?)

6. BASIC POLKA DOTS (either pink or green -no more purple allowed. Too boring?)

7. GREEN STITCHING (also maybe a little dull?)

FUNNIEST. VIDEO. EVER.

2009-03-11T20:36:00.001-07:00

ALRIGHT I CONFESS! I caved.

2009-03-11T19:47:00.004-07:00

4 days without sleep, it turns out, is my max. I just couldn't take it. I know, I know, I am a big wuss with a drug problem, but I'm pretty okay with that. Besides - instead of feeling like I want to do this everywhere:

I look more like this (albeit slightly older):

**To clarify: this is supposed to be what wide eyed and perky looks like.

But have no fear friends, for I have a PLAN. Whenever we talked about the Plan of Salvation on my mission, either my companion or I would invariably say it in Hollywood dramatic style "THE PLAN". So anyway. My plan (in case you care), is that instead of letting myself stay up and get up at any time all willy nilly whenever I feel like it, I now have a bedtime and a wakeup time. It's like being 6 years old and in seminary all at the same time. Plus, instead of going from 5 mg of Ambien to zero, I'm going down to 2.5 mg first. That may be slightly less shocking to my system. And oh yes - I am locking the pantry after 9pm. So far, THE PLAN seems to be helping. We'll see.

And FYI - yes, I have tried hot baths/no baths/Melatonin/Valerian root/warm milk/cold milk/no food/lots of food/no Diet Coke/many Diet Cokes/reading to fall asleep/not doing anything in bed but sleep/nothing exciting after 10pm/exercise/keeping pen and paper by my bed....you get the idea. Being on Ambien is not for want of trying other things. I have, as my esteemed physician put it, serious sleep issues.

I give, I give!!!

2009-03-07T00:10:00.002-07:00

It is almost midnight-thirty here on Day 4 of my Ambien-Free-Sleep-or-Bust marathon, and I am literally inches away from throwing in the towel. Here's how things have gone so far:

Day 1: Went to bed around 2:30, and actually went to sleep reasonably fast, and stayed asleep. Happy Day.
Day 2: Not as happy. Went to bed around 1:30 - tossed around more or less all night long.
Day 3: Not happy. Went to bed about 1, probably fell asleep about 2:30. So tired.
Day 4: Very seriously unhappy. EXHAUSTED by 8pm - bleary/red eyes, cranky pants, yada yada, but just cannot lay down until 11 - right about the time I feel like I will either fall asleep on the stairs on the way to bed or in the bathroom sink while brushing my teeth. I laid in bed until...now. What is with my mind?? It just spins and spins and thinks about primary and what color to paint Addy's room and what the annual cost of my Ambien is and did I remember to pay the water bill, etc. (answers: blue, a lot, and no).
I just cannot figure out what happens between the brushing my teeth and crawling into bed that makes my brain think that THIS is the perfect time to solve the AIDS crisis in Africa. Argh!!!

The other thing weakening my resolve (besides the obvious crippling lack of sleep) is a little tidbit I heard today from a friend....that apparently you CAN have Ambien while you are pregnant. Her friend took it every day her entire pregnancy. Come again? Que? Pardon? Wat? Oh hells bells. Why am I putting myself through this agony again?
Note - I am NOT pregnant, but may at some point in the future be willing to put myself through that again, and when such a time comes, I had planned on NOT being an addict of any variety. Ah well. The best laid plans...

Two thoughts...yes, just two.

2009-03-03T10:11:00.009-07:00

OK, I realize that I haven't blogged in ages, and that I have much more important things to discuss (80's party recap, trip to Seattle, vowing to never have more kids, etc.), but I cannot resist sharing deep love for my favorite guilty pleasure...The Bachelor. For those of you that watched the finale last night and After the Rose #1 (#2 happens tonight), you have to admit that was some DARN GOOD TV!!! Gads I love a good crazy drama.

Second thing on my mind today is my other favorite guilty pleasure...Ambien. I've always known that if I hadn't the influence of church in my life, I would definitely be a rowdy crack addict rodeo clown. Or an alcoholic blackjack dealer. Or maybe a plastic surgery addict addicted to my kids' ADD meds. Either way, it would have been ugly and I would have been much more likely to be featured on Cops than I am when I host Bunko.

Thankfully, instead of pursuing a life of tawdriness, I've taken the medically safer route of being a good LDS wife, mother, sister, and primary chorister (although perhaps the latter is not always medically safe. Hmmm...) and self medicated with Nutella, Diet Coke, and Ambien instead of crack and Adderall.

Aaah Ambien. Oh how I love thee. Those who know me well know that I have a very serious love/hate relationship with sleep. I adore sleeping but loathe going to bed, which presents a conundrum...hence the Ambien. While it makes me happy and I sleep like a champ, it has had the unfortunate albeit amusing side effect of making me eat bizarre things at bizarre hours (see previous posts), which in turn has the not surprising effect of slowing turning me into a large desert warthog.

I have better hair and definitely a better shoe collection, but this does not negate my need for a diet.

Which brings me to my main point. As of today, I am officially entering Ambien detox. I've gotten myself down to only half a pill/night, but it's time to quit the juice entirely and go cold turkey. So, you can safely bet that tonight will entirely suck, and will include me weeping on the couch at 3:30am watching either infomercials (I'm putting the credit cards away as we speak), or Can't Buy Me Love for the 8th time.

Wish me luck and check back tomorrow to see how my willpower held out!

All things boo-ful

2009-01-26T16:57:00.006-07:00

Time for an Addy update post. Lately, she has been really into calling things beautiful, but she can't say it right so it comes out something like "boo-ful". "Mom. The sky is SO boo-ful!". Oh it is precious. Even more precious was when she said "Mom, your boobs are so boo-ful!". Why I tell you these things, I will never know. I guess I just can't resist an overshare...but she is SERIOUSLY SO FUNNY!!!!! And I don't know what the deal is with boobs. She's been obsessed with bodies lately, specifically mine. Today she made me help her put on one of my bras when she saw me do it (and no, I am not posting pictures), and yesterday she told me that I have a squishy bum. Well that's a newsflash.

This picture is one of those moments when I should have been disciplining my child, but I was laughing too hard to do it. I gave her one of those little snack bags of tiny Oreo's, and when I asked her if I could have one, she shouted NO!! and stuffed every last one into her mouth before I could get one. Do not get between this kid and her Oreo's.

Last Friday, a bunch of us took our kids to a puppet show theater in Denver and they had a ball. Word to the wise for adults though...if you absolutely HAVE to take your kids to a puppet show, be sure to bring either some headphones, a blindfold, or some Xanax. The kids loved it, but that was probably the most excruciating 45 minutes of my life. I would honestly have preferred a root canal. But, since this wasn't all about me, it was great.

***18 hours to go.

2009-01-17T18:36:00.001-07:00

20 Days Down; 16 To Go. Pray For Me.

So long, doggles.

2009-01-12T22:13:00.001-07:00

Note: I wrote this a few days ago - don't be afraid - I'm not still crying.

I have cried more times in the last week than I care to count! Not because I didn't get a subscription to People as requested for Christmas, but because we just shipped our dogs off to Seattle to have a new life. Hopefully, I'll have a new life too now - one free of allergies and dog poop in the backyard (or office) to clean up.

Thank heavens we have found the best possible home for our spastic beasts. Our good friends from Seattle, Trent & Celeste Lay, were brave enough to take them in. We shipped them off on New Year's Eve on United Cargo (and may I just say how weird it is to ship dogs?), they arrived intact and seem to be adjusting well to a new house, and a cat. Thank the stars! It makes this whole thing a lot easier to know they are in a great home.
I really miss them, but my asthma is slooooowly starting to get better, so I know this was the best thing to do. At least I get to visit them in Feb!

Things I will miss most about Idgie and Lucy (*sniff*):
1. Lucy curling up in my knee pit when I lie on the couch, and Idgie laying on my side. This always made for deliciously warm and snuggly TV sessions.
2. Lucy imitating a hoover and making herself gag from eating too fast.
3. Idgie jumping high enough to take bites out of Addy's 1st birthday cake, one small nibble at a time.
4. How they loved to do "den howls" with us if we let them.
5. How freaking fast they are! Especially running circles. Amazing.
6. Watching Idgie run from behind - she always looked a wee bit sideways, like her butt was just heavier on one side.
7. Dressing them up! They've been: hula dancers, 80's girls, pretty pretty princesses, Santa's, and tolerated (barely) a variety of coats, jackets, necklaces, and shirts. Yes, I am that cruel.
8. The way Idgie groans when she's comfortable.
9. The vomit noises that are not actually vomit that horrify everyone else, but make us die laughing.
10. How Idgie, the 10 lb wonder, has a bladder the size of Kansas reserved strictly for marking each and every bush we walk by.
11. Lucy "marking" anyone's neck that happened to be in any semi-recumbent position. Still one of the most bizarre but hilarious things I've ever seen.
12. How much they loved Addy and how much Addy loved them.
13. How utterly thrilled they were to see us everytime we came home. I really miss that.

I think I better NOT go see Marley & Me yet.

One Word Tag...

2009-01-09T20:01:00.004-07:00

1. Where is your cell phone? Unknown
2. Where is your significant other? Downstairs
3. Your hair color? Brown
4. Your mother? Energetic
5. Your father? Great
6. Your favorite thing? Ambien
7. Your dream last night? Bananas
8. Your dream/goal? Peace
9. The room you're in? Office
10. Your hobby? Games (currently)
11. Your fear? Loss
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Here
13. Where were you last night? Here
14. What you're not? Frugal
15. Something on your wish list? Wii
16. Where you grew up? Seattle
17. The last thing you did? Eat
18. What are you wearing? Pants
19. Your TV? On
20. Your pet? Gone!
21. Your computer? Eh
22. Your mood? Wheezy
23. Missing someone? Always
24. Your car? Hideous
25. Something you're not wearing? Tiara
26. Favorite store? Target
27. Your summer? Fine
28. Love someone? Definitely
29. Your favorite color? Purple
30. When is the last time you laughed? Today
31. Last time you cried? Last week (this cannot be answered in one word unless it was yesterday, which, thankfully, it was not)

I tag....oh everybody.

My Husband, the Genius.

2009-01-09T19:41:00.000-07:00

Good news today! Ammon PASSED his 2nd Actuary Exam!!!!!!!!! HURRAH!!!!!!!!!!!

2 days until the 80's party!!!!

2008-12-29T20:36:00.001-07:00

This ought to get you in the mood...

You are so money and you don't even know it.

2008-12-08T20:42:00.004-07:00

If you know me at all, you know that I love a good party. specifically costume parties. Sat night was a night in Vegas at "Babylon Towers Resort and Casino" at the Veile's. Seriously, I think we are all just LOOKING for reasons to dress up, which is AWESOME. We played a little poker (not with real money of course because a. we are Mormon and b. pretty sure we are all poor) - I got my butt kicked at Texas Hold 'em, but Ammon seriously cleaned house on Black Jack. Someday I need to take that man to Vegas.

Everybody came in some sort of themed costume - we had two Elvis's (from the early and the late years) complete with super skin tight jumpsuit. Paul is the bravest man I know. Let's see, we also had 2 Chipendales dancers (one in a nude bodysuit), CSI, shotgun bride/groom, hideous tourists, high rollers, and call girls and their "management". I was a Cougar and Ammon was my boy toy/gardener/pool boy named Greg. It rocked.

Wow. I have no words.

All the ladies in the house...

Here's me in my bling, and Anya, who was caught in flagrante with her business man lover (she's lucky I didn't post the picture of her skirt tucked into her tights). I really wanted to get a hideously dark spray tan to complete the look, but alas I didn't make a line item for bad tanning in the budget.

Micaela's Favorite Things

2008-12-03T14:07:00.028-07:00

So last year, I put together a pretty lengthy Christmas Wish List. A friend of mine told me a couple days ago to do it again this year, because, and I quote "I can't think of anything I want for Christmas". Good heavens, really??? How is that even possible? How can you not think of a single dingle thing you want? I want everything, which is probably the source of all my problems. Heh.

This list also serves a dual purpose, since it is my goal in life to rival Oprah in any way possible. Keep in mind that, like Oprah's list, this is a FANTASY wish list - at least to us plebians.

So Erica, here's to you - hopefully this will inspire you.

Sarah McLachlan just came out with a best of CD called Closer. Granted, I'll just get this at the library as soon as it comes our way, but whatever. I love Sarah.

I have a weird obsession with puffer vests. I realize that this is not the most flattering look for someone with my particular build, but that hasn't deterred me yet.

A GPS. Left over from last year's list. The driving world would thank you.

Oh yes...a gift card from Home Depot so we can actually finish our fence. And the downstairs bathroom. And build a dog door.

I love monograms/initials, and I LOVE these giant ones from Anthropologie.

See's. Duh. Specifically milk chocolate butter, milk bordeaux, and butterscotch squares.

Trish McEvoy Mascara. Bar none, the BEST mascara in the world!!! I'm in love, I'm in LOVE and I don't care who knows it!!!!

A new computer. Ammon's died a couple months ago (good heavens - what hasn't died in the last year for us?? The toaster. I think that's it). And my family would be so happy if we joined the world of the Mac.

I really, really need a new jacket/coat, because Miss Brilliantine here has lost not one, but TWO in the last year. But, I can't find one I like, so it will have to wait. However...I do have a few I'm looking at on eBay, so maybe a gift card to eBay? Heaven knows the list of things I can find to buy there are endless.

Grapefruit Bubble Bath by Philosophy although any good bubble bath will do.

New Bedding so I can put away all our random mismatched blankets.

And this fabulous door mat from (where else?) Pottery Barn.

The Fug Awards. A book from my favorite blog that mercilessly mocks celebrities in hideous clothes? Sign me up!!! By the way... Fug = Frightfully Ugly. If you don't believe me, check out GFY's FAQ's http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/faq/.

I adore Rings. These are all from Sundance.

Brown Riding Boots - I love these by Boden...

There are few things in life I love more than a granny nightgown.

And since our camera is currently held together with a paperclip, I think it's more than reasonable that I put a new one on this list. Nothing fancy shmancy, just something that can capture both red and black and doesn't require basic office supplies to function.

A trifle bowl! Everybody loves a good trifle! And who doesn't love Pampered Chef?

Wouldn't a webcam be fun? Then everyone I chat with can see what I look like at midnight with face mask, curlers, and teeth whitener! **note - not a nightly occurence. Yes, I admit it. I love all things celebrity (see The Fug Awards above). I am DYING to know what Kevin's side of the story is and what the twins are doing now and how much Botox Nicole has really had and why Paris and Benji broke up and why Rob's hair looks like it has a nesting bird in it. These are things I must know!! So, I would love a subscription to People.

I'm sure I'll think of at least 15 more things later today, so maybe I'll publish a MFT list Vol. 2. Feel free to let me know if you have suggestions. Oh, and by the way, a new car and Heidi Klum's body are not on this list because that's just a given.

Turkey Lurkey!!!

2008-11-27T21:28:00.007-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving!!! We had a great Thanksgiving today thanks to the Stanworth's for hosting, the Brigg's for Turkey Debacle '08, and Shannon and Corinn for fattening pies. Ammon and I were both a little worried this year that we would be at home alone on T-Day, eating Hungry Man dinners, so we were grateful that Erica and Kris didn't mind us crashing the party. However, Ammon did earn his spot at the table as the MasterTurkey Carver - a very serious business.

My little Thanksgiving Turkey Love:

Corinn, I am so sorry but this picture is too good not to post. You like the rolls, no?

Ammon again at turkey carving and Kris...on a chair. I don't know what is happening here.

The kidlets (not giblets...kidlets) at their table.

I learned about a delightful tradition today that apparently only I was not aware of: fat dog. Defined as: the state of being when one has stuffed themselves so completely that they slump to the floor in a heap and lie there panting until enough square footage in the stomach has been cleared for the next round of fat dog. I have witnessed fat dog at enough family events (and private parties for that matter) to be very familiar with this state, and am pleased as punch to have a name to give it.

Addyism's

2008-11-19T22:24:00.007-07:00

I just need to pause for a moment and say how much I LOVE my child!!! Addy is currently in the Excessive Talking stage where she isn't happy unless she's yelling, chattering, singing, asking "why, Mom, WHY?", or berating the dogs. Each stage is adorable and fun in it's own way, but this one has been my favorite so far. Is there anything on the planet cuter than a little girl making up songs in the bathtub about her elbows and singing in her off-key little girl voice??? Certainly not!

Now, amidst all this mushy love blubbering, I will confess that occasionally the constancy of The Voice makes me want to stick my knitting needles in my ears just for some peace and quiet. But, the majority of the time it just makes me want to weep openly. Like when she says "Ohhhhhhh I'm sooooooo Beeeeeauuuuutiful!". Sigh.

So here are a few of my favorite Addyism's of late:

To me at morning wake up call (not my most attractive time of day):

"Your face is so, so pretty Mommy!"

Talking on her fake cell phone to who knows who:

"Hi. It's me! Addy Cwapo!"

And my two most recent personal favorites.....(***please note - we do NOT talk about male body parts all day long at our house. Don't ask me where she got this).

To Ammon:

"Hi Daddy. How's your p----s?"

While standing on the couch the other day...mind you...there was no TV on or anything else happening that could have possibly inspired this thought:

"OH NO!!! I don't have a p----s!!!"

Thank heavens for that! Once she had that out in the open, she promptly moved on the something else. Where in the living heck to they come up with this stuff???

This little video was taken tonight in the car while they were waiting for me at Hobby Lobby, the little gems. In case you can't hear, she says something like "A, B, C, D, ......at Grandma's...I did it!!!".

And a couple cute shots...at the park with her friends (Ella, Addy, Kyla, Sydney), and on the North Pole Express today with Kyla. Mind you - they are riding the North Pole Express while it's 70 degrees out. Gads.

Is it just me, or is this dress super freakin' cute? (for Addy)

2008-11-13T15:15:00.001-07:00

I HEART EBAY!

2008-11-11T10:40:00.009-07:00

So, it's that time of year again for me. Time to clean out my closets and hidden corners, earn a little extra Christmas money, and spend a ridiculous but completely legitimate amount of time on eBay....with my annual Virtual Garage Sale on eBay!

I'm only about 1/3 of the way through stuff I want to post, so feel free to kill time at work and check back!

My seller ID is addysmom06 (I know - terribly creative). Or you can just find me here.

Thanks for looking!

I want candy...

2008-11-09T22:03:00.002-07:00

OK, it's official. I SUCK at Candyland. Not only did I get beaten 3 times tonight by my husband, but I also got waxed by a 2 year old! What a totally dumb game. Bah!

You better too!!!

2008-11-04T16:42:00.002-07:00

I was going to say who (whom?? gads I hate that one) I voted for, but out of respect for my home that I don't want T.P.'d, I think I'll keep quiet. And I'm pretty sure that just gave it away. OK - the cat is out of the bag. I voted for Obama. Go ahead and get out your eggs! =)

Alright. I think I've been pretty good this election season and kept fairly quiet about my political views, but it's election day (my favorite day of the year other than Christmas!) and I just have to air my thoughts. Rest assured, I have absolutely no intention of debating candidates or policies or Sarah Palin's wardrobe.

I have to begin by saying that after experiencing my first Presidential election in CO, I am astounded and a little disappointed by how utterly one-sided this race has been, at least here in our little neck of the woods. I am literally the only person I know within 10 square miles that voted for Obama. There was one other guy that was going to, but even he changed his mind at the last minute! LOL. Granted, we really do live on the outskirts of the wilderness here, so it shouldn't be too surprising. OK, but seriously!!! How does this happen???? Coming from Seattle, you'd think I'd be used to seeing partisan politics (albeit on the other side of the coin), but I've never seen anything like this.

On a personal note, I'm also surprised at how isolated this has made me feel. There has been plenty of good natured ribbing, which I SO don't mind and think is fun, but even so, it's depressing that I have to call someone 3 states away to find a similar point of view. It also makes "political debates" a joke, because it kind of sucks being the only person on one side of an argument.

Now let me clarify - this doesn't mean that I am secretly deriding and ridiculing anyone who voted for McCain (that would mean my entire social circle so that would be silly). Ammon and I have never voted for the same candidate, but I've always respected his opinion because he reads and thinks and discusses and THEN votes. Novel idea! How can I argue with his decision when he has perfectly legitimate reasons for making it? The point is, I think anyone that votes for McCain with valid reasons makes a wise decision, and the same for Obama. What I can't stand is partisan politics, and assumptions about political affiliation based solely on demographics. Does the fact that I am a white, mid 30's, Mormon, stay-at-home-mom automatically make me a Republican? Of course not.
My single biggest irritation during this election has been comments made by people who assumed that, of course, I'd be voting for McCain. I'm surprised by some of the offensive, ridiculous, and extreme things I've heard people say before they knew I wasn't part of the club. I think it's a particular type of arrogance to assume that everyone you know must think the same way, because it is so clearly just a question of right and wrong.
What gives anyone the idea that there is one right answer in any political discussion? That because we share religious beliefs that automatically translates into politics as well?
First of all, don't assume you know someone's political views. If the leaders of our church don't publicly endorse a certain candidate, then we probably shouldn't either. At least my friends that tease me know my views and are respectful. Besides, I think it helps open the topic up for discussion.

AAAAAAAAAAAAH!hhhhhHH!!!!!!! Ammon keeps interrupting me saying "Did you vote yet for EVIL GENIUS???" I'm going to strangle him!!!!!!!!!!

Gads I am blathering now, and starting to foam at the mouth. Perhaps that's my cue to stop? lol.

OK, off the soapbox. Whomever (whoever??) you voted for, Happy Returns!

Wonder Woman sure loves her friend Ella!

2008-11-01T11:48:00.000-07:00

Confessions of a... Dangerous mind? Mad Librarian? Wino?

2008-10-29T20:33:00.008-07:00

In case you're wondering where the post title for today came from, just Google "confessions of a" and see what comes up. I'm not really a wino. Anymore.

Today is Wednesday Confessional Day, which I actually started 24 hours early last night at book club, but....since most of you weren't there, here are my True Confessions:

1) I am 100% addicted to Gossip Girl. Horrible, terrible, awful show with absolutely zero redeeming qualities, no moral values whatsoever, and a very skeevy guy named Chuck. And yet...I am addicted. I have even gone so far as to publicy lambast the trashfest that is Gossip Girl (at last month's book club) only to become sucked in by Satan's Show myself. I think I need an intervention. Luckily, I recently learned that I am not alone in my angst. Out of respect for her privacy, my fellow sufferer will remain nameless. Unless you bring me a Diet Coke. Then, I will tell all.

2) I drove to 3 separate fast food places at 8pm tonight in search of a Blizzard, or something like unto it. After 30 minutes and 15 miles, I now I have a serious case of heartburn. I think I totally deserve it.

3) My all time fave site has a sketchy name, but utterly hilarious content. This is where I go when I've given myself overindulgence heartburn or have a serious case of The Monday's (10 points if you got the Office Space reference). See for yourself. I think this time I may have actually laughed my face off. http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/go_fug_yourself/cat_541/

This one is pretty good too: http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/

4) Ammon opened his desk drawer last week to find not only a mouse, but MOUSE BABIES IN A NEST!!!!!! Ewwww!!!!! But the confession is that they were sort of freakishly cute and I actually shed a tear when he turned them out into the cold cold night.

5) Sometimes, I want a remote for my child, specifically one that has a mute button. We've entered the dreaded "Why Mom? But WHY? Whhhhyyyyyyy????" phase. Since I'm fresh out of kid mute buttons, I've considered inserting Q-tips on a permanent basis. I would do earplugs, but I'm still traumatized by a recent incident. I feel bad about these thoughts that I have, because it really is quite cute most of the time, especially in that adorable little girl voice. The same one that says "Pwwweeeeeeeease Mommy?" I'm a sucker for Pweese.

This is a kid who loves her swim lessons.

And her chocolate.

Quothe Rachel Zoe: "I Die".

2008-10-18T07:40:00.002-07:00

I covet, I worship, I lust. Am I wrong for loving these boots so much I would sell a kidney? I want to hear your opinion. Hath my fashion eye run amok from overexposure to fur and feathers by watching too much Bravo?

Nothing like the smell of fresh poop in the morning

2008-10-02T07:42:00.005-07:00

Sweet little Addy comes walking into my room this morning to wake me up...."Moooom. MOM! WAKE UP! MOOOOOOM!!!! Look at my hands!"

So, I comply and what to my wondering eyes did appear? Five tiny fingers all yucky and gross, covered in poop 1 inch from my nose.

OH yes she did. She did the dreaded Diaper Dive and then thought it would be an even more special experience if she woke me up with it. I looooooove staying at home!!!!!!!!!

Reason #2 I love being at home: Addy has given my cleavage a new name: My Pocket. Apparently, it's a pocket now that can hold all kinds of fun treasures, like food and jewelry, and last night, her sippy cup.

She decided she needed to put her sippy cup TO BED IN MY POCKET. I kid you not - she tucked it in there (very cold by the way), covered it up in her pig blanket, and patted it and told it "night night sippy!". ADORABLE!!! She makes me laugh SO HARD!! I love this kid!!

Addy learning to paint at her first Discovery Days. Thanks Diana!

Yes, that is dog food she's put on her plate. It's currently her favorite food. Oy.

This does not bode well. This is how we found her one day after a "nap".

Fireman Addy! Firewoman? Whatevs.

This is on my last day of work with a now former co-worker of mine, Tom. Tom was the only one in my office with young kids that could appreciate my fun but incessant Addy stories.

Relief Society Gone Wild

2008-09-30T14:59:00.009-07:00

It's finally official! I've had the cops called on me TWICE and my neighbors hate me. Yes, this is not a lie. I am a disturber of the peace and a public nuisance (well not officially, but it sounds more fun).

The first police incident was actually the fire department accompanied by 3 police cars. I take absolutely zero of the blame for this one - it all goes to Ammon-PyroManBoy-Crapo who thought it would be an excellent idea to light our Christmas tree on fire in the middle of the backyard on a snowy January eve. Note I said eve. Had he lit said fire at noon like he had the year before, the 25 foot flame ball wouldn't have been quite as noticeable to our loving neighbors who thoughtfully called us to be sure everything was fine, and then promptly called the fire department on us anyway.

Incident number 2, however...all me, or should I say...all the ladies of the Relief Society. OK, actually just 11 of them, but that is one rowdy group, believe you me missy.

To complete my indoctrination into the life of a suburban mom, I joined a Bunko group with a bunch of girls from church. For those of you not familiar with Bunko, it's basically a chance for women to get together and yell a lot and talk about boobs and pregnancy, with dice as an accessory.

On Friday night I hosted Bunko at my house, and as it was a nice breezy fall evening, I left all of the windows open. Which leads us to the yelling. To be clear, yelling in Bunko is not constant, but a scream let out at random intervals the likes of which you have never heard in nature, nor will again, with roughly the decibel level of a giant bullhorn going off 4 cm from your eardrum.

So. If you were my neighbor, and for 2 straight hours you heard occasional but forceful primal female screams, what conclusion would you draw? I thought so. Which is why at roughly 10pm, the cops knocked on my door for the second time in a 12 mth period. When I opened the door, laughing so hard at Mr. Officer that I was crying, I'm pretty sure he thought I was drunk. The fact that there were 10 women in the background also crying in hysterical laughter and screaming "BUT WE'RE MORMONS!!! WE'RE NOT EVEN DRINKING!!!!" did not help the situation. He looked very alarmed, but was very nice and kindly asked us to keep the sounds of domestic abuse down to a respectable level. Who said life in the suburbs was boring?

Us. Or at least our inspiration for RSGW.

"...cleaning crud up in the kitchen..."

2008-09-15T14:37:00.002-07:00

If you hadn't heard already, I QUIT MY JOB!!!! Today is my first official day in Stay-At-Home-Motherdom.
While being a SAHM is INFINITELY preferable to working full time at a job you don't give two snoots about, there are a few challenges.

Here is my first day (so far) in numbers:

3 - poopy diapers
1 - arrival of mom's "monthly fun"
0 - naps
1 - pee on the carpet
6 - loads of laundry done
3 - Diet Cokes consumed by mom
45 - mins of TV so far watched by child (not too bad I think)
68 - number of times I have said NO!
2 - max number of times I can listen to "Apples and Bananas"
1 - email responded to

I can just picture my sister laughing uproariously right now saying "I told you so!!!" in her evil old sister-y voice. Oh gads I need a nap.

Plugged

2008-09-07T20:47:00.002-07:00

OK, so I know I am WAY behind on blogging, and I do have so much to say. But, I'm tired and I have a recording of Wipeout to watch, so you'll have to wait.

But, I do feel compelled to share with you an extremely true and disturbing story:

So, most of you know that I sleep with earplugs. Ammon, bless his heart he tries so hard, snores like a drunken hippo, or at least he used to until he had sinus surgery last month.

Upon entering the state of matrimonial bliss, my options were to yell at him to roll over every 6 minutes or learn to like earplugs. I chose the latter. Now, I am addicted. Obsessed. I LOVE MY EARPLUGS and I seriously cannot live without them now. Even if I am sleeping in a hotel room all by myself, I MUST have a pair. **Sidenote - I forgot them on our recent trip, and I kid you not I didn't sleep the entire night.

One other thing you must understand about me to fully appreciate the horror this story involves: I have a very serious medical condition called "Phobia of Ear Wax". It's true. Just writing that made me throw up a little in my mouth. I have to leave the room when people discuss it (which, I must ask, why in the world would anyone think that ear wax is EVER an appropriate topic of discussion in social situations??? I don't care how close you are to your friends! Never never never talk about ear wax!!!!). Looking at it...I can't even consider.

You can understand then, why I almost passed out this morning when I woke up and realized I was chewing on something. "Hmmmm..." thought I. "That feels like a big wad of paper. How did that get in my mouth??". As I reached in to pull out the mystery wad of paper, I saw that it wasn't some innocuous ball of chewed up receipts or love notes, IT WAS ONE OF MY EAR PLUGS!!!! IN MY MOUTH!!!!!! CHEWED UP!!!!!!!!!

Oh my gosh I'm going to puke.

HOW in the living heck did I put something so disgusting in my mouth, and then CHEW on it for who knows how long!!!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

I don't even know what else to say, except that I think I am off ear plugs. Why, why, WHY would my unconscious mind do this to me???? Doesn't it know that I can't think of anything more disgusting to put in my mouth? And why was it thinking I needed something in there while I was sleeping anyway?? Do I have some kind of secret oral fixation that only a very hidden part of my mind is aware of? Have I done this before? What else have I chewed on? Luckily there aren't really any other items on my nightstand that would fit in my mouth...although....my alarm clock is very small.

Luckily, I keep a clean set of ears, but STILL. Ewwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!! I need some Scope.

My Perfect Body

2008-08-06T12:11:00.006-07:00

I can almost hear each of you guffawing loudly as you read the title of this post. Rest assured, I have no delusions of being a size 2, or even a size 10 for that matter.

My mom and I were commiserating last night about the age we were when we had our "perfect body" (21 in my case). When everything was slim and strong and perky and bouncy in all the right places. Aaaaah, I miss that body.

My 32 year old body is a seriously long way from that cute little 21 year old body I used to have, with more flaws than I care to desribe. I passed perfection a loooooong time ago.

But, to very loosely quote a friend of my mom, what if perfection doesn't necessarily mean mean "without flaws" (perfect teeth, shiny hair, no stretch marks or cellulite) but what another definition I found says: nothing requisite is wanting. I love that. Nothing requisite is wanting = perfection.

My body gets me where I need to go - it walks, it dances, it occasionally runs. It definitely kneels. It lifts my daughter and hugs my husband and pets my dogs. It's great at laughing and at crying. It lets me do laundry and type emails. My body has allowed me to work and help support my family. My body has all it's 5 senses and sometimes a 6th, or even a 7th. I can see, smell, touch, and hear my own child. I can taste food! My body even lets me drink Diet Coke.

I can climb the stairs and climb in bed or into the tub. I can paint, I can ride a bike, I can blow dry my hair. I have hair! My body let's me teach music to adorable kids and sing and flail my arms. It allows me to cook if I want, or watch a movie, or walk around Costco.

I can comfort, I can hug and kiss, I can be every role I have and any other role I want: wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, etc.

In short, my body does absolutely everything I need it to.

I have a perfect body.

*****************************************************************

And to end on a humorous note, I've included a conversation from one my favorite movies, Beautiful Girls (sensitive souls - don't watch this unedited). It's Rosie O'Donnel's character, Gina, telling some of the guys in the movie what shallow idiots they are. Have no fear - it's been edited, although there are a large # of references to boobs. Be warned.

Gina: I'm finished speaking to both of you okay? You're both insane. You want to know what your problem is? MTV, Playboy, and Madison Avenue. Yes. Let me explain something to you, ok? Girls with big boobs have big butts. Girls with little boobs have little butts. That's the way it goes. God doesn't mess around; he's a fair guy. He gave the fatties big, beautiful breasts and the skinnies little tiny niddlers. It's not my rule. If you don't like it, call him.

[Looking at a porn magazine]

Gina: Oh, guys, look what we have here. Look at this, your favorite.

Tommy: I could go along with that.

Gina: Yeah, that's nice right? Well, it doesn't exist ok. Look at the hair. The hair is long, it's flowing, it's like a river. Well, it's a weave ok? And the boobs, please! I could hang my overcoat on them. Breasts by design were invented to be suckled by babies. Yes, they're purely functional. These are silicon city. This is a mockery, this is a sham. Implants, collagen, plastic, capped teeth, the fat sucked out, the hair extended, the nose fixed... These are not real women, all right? They're beauty freaks. And they make all us normal women with our wrinkles, our puckered boobs, hi bob, and our cellulite feel somehow inadequate. Well I don't buy it, all right? But you idiots, if you think that if there's a chance in hell that you'll end up with one of these women, you don't give us real women anything approaching a commitment. It's pathetic. I don't know what you think you're going to do. You're going to end up eighty-years old, drooling in some nursing home, then you're going to decide, it's time to settle down, get married, have kids? What, are you going to find a cheerleader?

Tommy: I think you're over simplifying.

Gina: Oh shut it. Look at Paul. With his models on the wall, his dog named Elle McPherson. He's insane. He's obsessed. You're all obsessed. If you had an once of self-esteem, of self-worth, of self-confidence, you would realize that as trite as it may sound, beauty is truly skin-deep. And you know what, if you ever did hook one of those girls, I guarantee you'd be sick of her.

Tommy: What?

Gina: No mater how perfect the face, how supple the thigh, unless there is something else going on in the relationship, besides the physical, it's going to get old, ok? And you guys, as a gender, have got to get a grip. Otherwise, the future of the human race is in jeopardy.

It's My Birthday....OK it was yesterday.

2008-07-17T19:33:00.006-07:00

Officially, I was born 7/16/76 weighing 7lbs 6oz sometime around 11:06 or 11:07 am. In case your math is bad, this makes me 32. I had black black hair, and apparently looked Chinese, according to a random couple looking through the nursery window.

Officially, I was named "Girl Moulton", and unofficially called Kimberly by parents until I was 3 months old. At that time, my mom (and dad? I'm sketchy on the details of this decision) decided she liked the name Micaela Heather better, and unofficially wrote my "new name" on my birth certificate in pen. Officially, this became a fat pain in the arse for me when I was DROPPED OFF at the DMV on my 16th birthday for my driving test (my parents either had a misplaced amount of faith in my driving abilities or were a wee bit foolish). I managed to pass the test by a healthy margin of 2%, but was denied my license because, according to the State of Washington, I was still legally "Girl Moulton". Apparently, writing on an official court document with a Bic does not constitute a legal change.

I love that story, and since hopefully none of you know me as Girl or Kimberly, I guess we got Micaela officially documented.

Here is me at 2 months. Methinks this is not what Chinese babies look like, but what do I know?

This is our little fam at my parents wedding in SLC (this is my stepdad). I'm starting to get cuter by this age, and I'm the only one in this picture that shouldn't be embarrassed by their hair. I guess Cassy's isn't THAT bad.

TAG

2008-07-09T13:33:00.004-07:00

OK, this is too funny. I was catching up on my blog reading and stumbled on a fun tag Peggy had done. Just so you know, I LOVE TAGS. I thought to myself "this looks like a fun tag, but no on actually tagged me to do it, but I really want to talk about myself, so I'll just do it anyway". Admit it - you have all had similar thoughts. Anyway, I kept reading and noticed at the bottom that Peggy actually DID tag me, so if I do this tag, I'm not a self-absorbed freak after all! Hurrah! Thanks Peg!

1) What was I doing 10 years ago?
1998... Let's see, I was on my mission until October and then went home. I got engaged a month after that which ended a month after that - all before 1999! I am an overachiever.

2) What are 5 things on my to-do list today.
1. Work for 8 hours - I think I've logged in 90 minutes?
2. Clean the house - work in progress
3. Marinate the chicken for our dinner guests - awww crap
4. Shower - check (yeah me!)
5. Exercise - later

*This is my own addition - things NOT on your list that you did today: rearranged the living room, read blogs, posted on blog, plucked my eyebrows, shopped eBay, read People.com and talked to my sister. Very productive day.

3) What are some snacks that I enjoy?-
Oh my, this could be a very long answer.
-Diet Coke, although this is more of a food group for me than a snack.
-All time favorite - Nutella and pretzels
-Cereal, any kind
-Popcorn
-Paradise Bakery cookies in CO, Specialties cookies in Seattle
-Soft cheese and crackers
-Pirate's Booty
-Pik-Niks (original). Honestly, these are like crack. Don't start!
-Graham crackers and canned frosting

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire.
First, I would pay off all debts and invest, oh I don't know....a lot. Then I would pay off all our immediate family's debt (houses/cars, etc.) buy each family a new house, and a car of their choice. Over the next several years (because traveling is tiring and you need breaks), I would visit ever single dingle place I've ever wanted to go, including, but not limited to:
Banff -Canada, Grand Canyon, Australia, Japan, Lake Powell, South Africa, Greece, India, New Zealand, Kenya, Chicago, Germany, Ireland, Jerusalem, Egypt, Austria, Moscow, Nepal, China, Peru....OK, you get the idea. I would travel. I would also take my whole family on an amazing vacation every year.
I would buy a home in Switzerland and maybe the South of France, an apt in NY, and a house overlooking Puget Sound and the Olympics in Seattle. I would get 3 cars (b/c more than that is excessive), laser hair removal, permanent teeth whitening and possibly liposuction. I would have lots more kids including several that I'd adopted, and 2 nannies. I would put a movie theater in my house and have a personal trainer and a chef. Once I reached a size 2 (OK 6), I would go ballistic and buy amazing clothes, and at least 20 ridiculous purses. And lots of jewelry - really cool pieces I could pass on to my kids.
I would setup some kind of scholarship fund for either young marrieds in college, or something like that. And I would drop anonymous baskets of food and money at people's houses that I knew needed it. I would find my own causes and donate lots of time and money to each. My kids would all be in private school and would learn at least 2 other languages. Oh and I forgot - I would have 10 dogs, a pool, tennis courts, and I would host a semi-annual girls week at my house for all my old girlfriends.
Holy hannah - time to stop. You get the picture.

5) Places I've lived.
I think I've answered this in a different tag - it's not a very exciting answer. WA, ID, UT, CO. How about foreign countries I've visited? Mexico, Canada, France, England, Spain, Switzerland, Italy, Belize, Honduras, is Grand Cayman a foreign country? I don't think so.

OK, I tag: anyone who wants to self disclose.

Idaho Boise Mission comin' at ya

2008-07-05T21:55:00.013-07:00

It is 11pm on Saturday night, which means that I should either be asleep or preparing music time for primary tomorrow. As you have no doubt observed, I am doing neither. The song I am supposed to be teaching the younglings this month is Called To Serve (which is about being a missionary). As I was digging through my non-scrapbooked mess of pictures and various nostalgia inducing mission paraphernalia looking for my mission nametag, I got totally distracted and spent a good hour laughing at all my old mission pics.

I know these pictures and anecdotes will not be half as amusing to you as they are to me, but I couldn't resist posting oodles of photos. I cannot BELIEVE I was ever that skinny or young. Note - I am not a champion scanner, so please, no complaints about crooked and otherwise retarded shots.

Classic and obligatory MTC map shot (my district)

Quite possibly the most awkard moment of my life: running into my not so long ago dumpee, Andrew, at my first area in Boise. Think about it like this...you're thinking to yourself "wow, it was only like 4 months ago that I was kissing this guy, and now here I am with a nametag". Hmmm. It didn't help that he seemed to still be holding a grudge and took great delight in making me feel as weird as possible.

*Sidenote - pretty sure this is the last time I ever wore a belt.

Aaaaah Peggy my love. Peggy was my first stake missionary who made S. Fuller and I monkey bread and kept me sane during my first 3 months in the IBM. Peggy is one of only 2 people I keep in touch with from the mish (so sad) and most definitely the funniest person alive. We visited her and her cute fam recently in UT - see this post and then this one. I cannot possibly top Peggy's artful descriptions of our trip.

P-Day at Bogus Basin with my first zone. One of the funnest days ever.

In case you were wondering what people in Idaho do in their spare time - this is it. Learn how to do "The Wedding Ring".

I call this little piece of photo art "Dork on a Bike". It started snowing shortly after this picture was taken. Because that made it look even more normal (Nampa, ID).

And in case The Wedding Ring didn't convey what complete hicks all residents of ID are, this should help. This is me in Twin Falls learning how to "run the shoot" while my Zone Leader (E. Bloomfield on the right) was "bull-dogging". I kid you not, that's what they called it. Basically it means trying to wrestle a wild bull to the ground with your bare hands. You only win if they get all 4 hooves up in the air. I think this was what people did for fun before Tetris was invented.

Here is Vick and I (or Sister Beaumont, now Mrs. Kennington) washing Barney the purple love bear. I don't think we called it a love bear, but it sounds more interesting this way (Sun Valley, ID).

And this, of course, is what we wore tracting. My sister thought it would be funny to send me this little camo see-through nightie, since I would get so much use out of it as a sister missionary. As ever, Vicki and I found a way to be totally inappropriate and laugh our guts out.

Sister Swainson was my 2nd companion (although this is a reunion several months later) and a Canuck, who ended up marrying our Zone Leader 4 months after she got home. She was awesome. SUPA-STAR!

A missionary's halfway point (for sisters that would be 9 months out) is called their Hump Day (think of a bell curve). And since it's 9 mths...you get the idea. It's tradition to pretend you are prego and about to pop. Although it just occurred to me that even when I was 7 mths pregnant for reals, I was WAY bigger than this. I think this is me being optimistic.

This is Sister Munganzaya, my cute little Mongolian companion, and I in our dive of an apartment in Mountain Home - the ugliest place ever. I think I drove her totally nuts. In my defense though, she made me get up at 5:30am every day and go RUNNING. Those of you that know me can imagine that this was not a boon to our relationship.

And to close, my sweet, sweet love, Vicki, who used to punch me in the boobs and still honks when she laughs. I miss you, you crazy Brit!

JUNE 2008 - A MEMOIR

2008-06-26T18:03:00.010-07:00

I wish I could even begin to describe the last month we have had. I have started to write this particular post at least 6 times and can never quite convey the proper amount of amazement and SHEER HORROR at how MANY things can go wrong in one person's life at one time!!!!! OH. MY. HEAVENS. You know when you say "it couldn't get any worse?" and people always tell you not to say that because things can always get worse? Well, I am now officially the living testament to that belief. It really is true...things can and likely will always get worse.

Note: I already told you about how Ammon got laid off...that was in May so it doesn't actually appear on the world's worst-month-ever events, but just keep that little bit of info in the back of your head when reading the June play-by-play below.

June 3 - Ammon's birthday and day of Actuarial Exam #2. Also known as: June 3 - the most anxiety filled day in a seriously long time. And no, we don't know his score yet (August).

June 9 - Speeding Ticket #1. I was on route to the airport and speeding madly (no surprise) because I had left late (no surprise there either) and wanted to be sure my friend didn't miss her flight. Bother.

June 11 - Dropped a contact down the drain. Keep in mind, these are hard contacts and not quuuuiiiiiiite as easily replaceable as soft. Thankfully, the contact was recovered after some serious sweaty effort on the part of Ammon, bless his heart, and a whole lot of water. And yes, I washed it at least 17 times before even considering sticking it back in my eye.

June 11 - Speeding Ticket #2. Due to the contact trauma earlier that morning, I got a late start (again, no surprise - do I ever leave or get anywhere on time?) to Pueblo, a 2.5 hour drive away, and the official Armpit of the Universe (with the exception of Moses Lake, WA). Because of speeding ticket #1, I set the cruise control for 90% of the trip, until about 30 mins away from Pueblo when I started speeding again because I realized I was late. Again. It took the female detective, not patrol officer, over 30 MINUTES to write me a ticket. Because I wasn't speeding or anything because I was LATE. Gads. Then she informed me that a) she never gives out tickets and lucky me I am the special exception and b) I was in a construction zone so my fine was doubled. Awesome. I think this must have been one of those new fangled "invisible construction zones" because there was not a cone or hint of orange within 50 miles.
Obviously I will be fighting this ticket, but there is a healthy chance that cops will knock on my door anytime now and take my license away before I get the chance. That, or my insurance will cancel me.

June 19 - The Passat has a premature and unexpected death. In Wyoming. Ammon decided last minute to drive to his niece's wedding in UT. He makes it to Rock Springs, WY (aka the 3rd Armpit of the Universe) where the car promptly decided it has taken enough abuse from the Crapo's, and died. We had a frantic 2 hours of ridiculous calls back and forth between Ammon and I trying to figure out what in blazes to do. Incredibly, our friend Miguel's dad lives not too far from there, and he rescued Ammon and not only towed the car to his house and let Ammon crash there, but then took him and the car all the way into SLC the next day. It is AMAZING to me what people are willing to do for you in a crisis. In anticipation of me driving to WY to pick up Ammon (bad idea), I had dropped Addy off at our wonderful friend's the Cox's who were immediately willing to let Addy stay over. Luckily, Miguel rescued us from our own idiocy before I got out of Frederick.

June 20 - We get THE ESTIMATE on the Passat. Are you ready? $8,000. I did NOT add an extra zero. Apparently the oil pump failed, the engine siezed, and that's that. We are now a one car family and the car is going to be buried in Salt Lake. Ammon flew home that night.

June 21 - Micaela floods the laundry room. Because a lost job, two tickets, and a dead car weren't enough, I thought I needed just one more trauma. I wish I could say that one of the machines failed, but sadly, it was all me. In one of my finer moments, I filled the laundry room sink to soak some clothes, and left the water running for a minute while I ran into the kitchen for something. Overcome by ADD and/or a wild fascination with dishes and what was on the Discovery Channel, I completely forgot about the water until roughly 30 minutes later when I heard the unmistakable sound of trickling water. I remember thinking to myself "if Ammon and Addy are both napping, then who is taking a shower? OH NO I DID NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I actually said that in my head as I streaked into the laundry room to find water happily filling up the room and spilling down the air vent into the basement and the furnace below. Naive as ever, I thought we had managed to clean everything up with 29 towels and a wet vac, until as a precaution, we called the insurance company and had ServiceMaster come out.
Today is now June 26, and there are still 7 fans and 2 ginormous de-humidifiers going full blast 24/7. Since the decibel level is roughly that of a 757, we have more or less had to stop all verbal communication.
It turns out that we have to replace the floor and cabinets in the laundry room and the bathroom across the hall, as well as have the ENTIRE first floor wood refinished, which is 88% of the square footage. Apparently, we have to move out for an entire week while this happens. Living in a motel with a toddler and 2 dogs for a week should be super fun.

As ridiculous and horrid and bizarre this all sounds, I am actually doing quite well and keeping a pretty good sense of humor about the whole thing. I did have one giant long "WHY.....WHY????" sob session, but since then I feel quite philosophical about it all. Just think - now that we are down to one car, we have no car payment. And, if I really hated the bathroom floor, now I can redecorate for free! At one point, we did consider burning the house down to maximize the insurance benefit, but luckily good sense prevailed.
As a final note - the month is not quite over, so please pray that neither of us is struck by lightning, attacked by wild ants, or gets arrested for lighting Christmas Trees on fire in our backyard.

Hurray For Blogs!

2008-06-26T17:50:00.003-07:00

I've noticed something interesting about blogging....when I'm overly stressed and tired, I don't blog for obvious reasons, but I also don't read anyone else's blog because it makes me feel guilty that I'm not blogging, and who knows why else. But, I got over my little streak and starting catching up on my blog reading today and realized how much I had missed it! I feel totally disconnected from the world and even a little lonesome when I don't write and read blogs.
I love it when I read some personal insight that someone has come up with, or even just a bad-day-vent. It's makes that person somehow more real. My friend Marie B. is excellent at this. And I'm off to read more of all your fascinating lives.

You know you have a problem when...

2008-06-18T20:00:00.003-07:00

...you find Nutella on your bra.

Me llamo es Micaela

2008-06-01T20:12:00.002-07:00

In large part, this thing is freakishly accurate.

What Micaela Means

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.

You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.

You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.

You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.

A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

under pressure

2008-05-28T19:50:00.003-07:00

May I just state that I am stressed? Not just your every day "Oh dang I forgot to buy milk and pay the phone bill" kind of stressed, but full on, all out, rash-inducing, zit-creating, 15 cookie-eating, obsessive picking, spontaneous crying, dog kicking (figuratively), overplucking and not sleeping STRESSED.

My shoulders are already tense from writing that. Oy.

Since you will no doubt ask, I am stressed because of the following:

1) Ammon has his 2nd Actuary exam (don't ask - just check this website: http://www.beanactuary.org/about/whatis.cfm) on Tues, June 3. Also his birthday. Poor guy - he should be the one writing this post.

2) Ammon got laid off (a blessing in that he has ample study time, a curse because, well duh: no job = no money)

3) I seem to have reached the end of my ability to tolerate boneheads (idiots/boobs/ nincompoops/nitwits/dolts - insert your favorite adjective) and work outside the home. Not that I wouldn't run across any as a stay at home mom, but my guess is that the interactions would be much less frequent. Especially since I won't technically report to one.

4) My house is a rat infested slime hole where cockroaches go to die. Perhaps that's an exaggeration but it feels that way. And I have a beloved friend coming to visit in less than 2 weeks, and I haven't the faintest idea when I'll have time to clean. Not that she would judge me, but you understand.

5) Addy has started the potty training process, which is great, but has one unpleasant side effect: post bath, she likes to run willy-nilly around the house like a little nudist, which is actually very charming and funny, until she decides to pee somewhere - usually in our bedroom (see #4). Apparently this is great fun and an endless source of entertainment.

I could go on, but you get the gist. Does a visual help? ME = see below.

I think maybe I will go read some Bloom County. Laughter is supposed to help stress, yes?

Photo update of the Lovekins

2008-05-13T19:52:00.006-07:00

I LOVE MILK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahhh the Happy Gardener. Addy definitely gets the gardening gene from Grandma Carol.

I'm sorry, but I have the cutest kid alive.

Kyla and Addy drowning trees together. Good times.

For all you Twilight lovers out there...

2008-05-13T18:55:00.004-07:00

...the official teaser. My take on the series: good fun, certainly not earth shattering. Liked it, but wouldn't cut off my right arm for more. I will say though, I had a dang lot of yummy vampire dreams while I was reading these.

FFA - Friday Free For All: The Maiden Voyage

2008-05-05T19:19:00.004-07:00

Alright. I realize it is NOT Friday, but I am a working mom and that is my excuse for everything. Literally.

Anywho. I am now officially a Groupie of a fantasic blog called Friday Free For All, wherein each bonafide member takes turns picking a topic to discuss on their own blog on....Friday. Brilliant! I'm not sure what it takes to become a bonafide member (aka Genius). I think it's something akin to becoming a cardinal or the Pope (think smoke, secret ballots, crazy hats). No offense, Catholic friends. Groupie's are allowed to post responses on their own blogs. We just can't come up with new sparkling and witty topics that really should be heard and posted on FFA and discussed by all but whatever. Not bitter. Noooooo.

On to it - the topic for Friday, May 5 was: What is the lamest thing you ever did as a teenager that you thought was SOOOOO cool?

I could spend hours upon hours listing the gajillion and 4 beyond lame and stupid things I did in my formative years, but in the interest of self preservation, and your attention span, I'll limit it to three:

1) I broke my coccyx while jumping off a train trestle into a nasty swamp stream/river (fondly known to Bothell-ites as "The Slough"). The act of trestle jumping itself does not automatically = broken coccyx - but it does when you land on your rumpus. Smooth. My friend Mark had to come in and rescue me.

2) I wrote a love letter to my deam lover in 8th grade. He was in my ward and we had band together (I played the flute and he played the trumpet - soooo sexy!). If I remember right, I think I actually wrote something like: "Let's stop just staring at each other during band and admit our feelings". I also called him once while my friend Molly was with me, and I played Richard Marx in the background to help set the mood ("Wherever you go, whatever you do...I will be right here waiting for you"). I had to keep moving closer to my cassette player so he could hear it. Subtle.

3) Let's call this one THE VERY WINDY DAY. One day when I was a junior in high school, we had a CRAZY storm in the Northwest - the power went out everywhere, trees were all over the roads, power lines dangling...it was wild. Since the power was out, we got let out of school around 10am. Instead of going home as recommended, my friends and I thought we'd make a day of it and just do really dumb hooligan-ish things all day. So, that's what we did. We drove around the Bothell/Kenmore area for 5 hours, wreaking havoc:

We pushed over a Port-a-Potty. This was my idea. I'd always wanted to do it (don't ask me why), so we found a construction site and did it. It wasn't that exciting. It just fell over.
We went "bowling" at Safeway using wallpaper/wrapping paper tubes and various kinds of fruit (round). The power was out at Safeway too, so no one noticed for quite some time. I don't think we paid for that fruit. Should I mail them a check or is it too late?
We stole traffic cones. No real reason. Just looked like fun.
We also stole a stop sign. And not just any stop sign. One of those HUMONSTROUS ones that are like 4 feet across. In our defense, the sign had fallen down already due to above mentioned storm. It had not, however, become unattached from the bolts holding it on to the pole. We actually went to one of our houses to get tools, came back, and unscrewed the stop sign from it's post. In broad daylight. Can you say idiotic? The funny thing is, that we didn't know what to do with it, so it just sat in the back of my closet for about 3 months until my parents found it. Then it sat in my trunk for another 2. I really don't know what ever happened to that sad stop sign.
We drove around the junior high track in my Toyota Corolla. That doesn't sound really bad until you consider that it was Seattle and had been pouring rain for at least 17 straight days. It started out completely innocently - we thought we'd go drive around the parking lot of our Jr. High Alma Mater (because that is so, like, the cool thing to do), and then there was this little road and we wondered where it went and then we realized we were heading to the track and then I couldn't back up and then I was on the track and then I realized if I stopped we would get stuck for days in the absolute quagmire the track had become so I just kept driving!! Totally innocent. On our way out of the parking lot after our tour, the Vice Principal came running out of the building after us - screaming and shouting and flapping his arms a lot. I stopped the car until he had almost caught up with us, and then I freaked out and floored that little Corolla as fast as it's V-2 engine would go. We had to rake out the 20" divets in the track, and I got suspended for I think 3 days.

Now you all know the truth. And now you can all report me to the police. I am not the perfect Molly Mormon you all thought I was. Thhhpppffffftttt (that's me trying not to laugh). I suppose whether or not this was surprising will be a good indicator of how well you know me. I may LOOK like a good person, but there is a seething criminal bubbling just beneath the surface! Mwwwwuuuuuhahahahaha.

I think these little petty crimes were my way of being a rebel, since I wasn't drinking and doing drugs. What a doofus I was. Although, I have to say, that stop sign was AWESOME.

Weird things you say to your kids:

2008-05-05T18:50:00.000-07:00

"DON'T DIP YOUR PRETZEL IN THE TOILET!"

In a word.

2008-05-02T14:20:00.008-07:00

en·tro·py (ěn'trə-pē)

n. pl. en·tro·pies

1. Inevitable and steady deterioration of a system or society.

Does this sound like the perfect descriptor of anyone else'e life besides mine?

I do try to improve my life a bit at a time, here and there.........house a little cleaner, a little more organized, child better taught, dogs more well-behaved, books returned on time, movies watched in less than 9 sittings, relationships a little more harmonious, laundry put away before it's dirty again, etc. etc. etc., and yet....

Somehow I not only never get ahead, but I seem to be slowly sliding down the slippery slope of dirty children and unshaved legs. Is there a secret recipe for actually making one life's better, instead of being in a constant state of slow and painful deterioration?

One more reason I shouldn't work from home:

2008-04-30T13:44:00.000-07:00

I have access to Blogger. And because I'm eating frosting straight out of the can with graham crackers.

Alright, so I wasn't officially tagged, but I liked this one...

Favorite movies you have to be "in the mood" for in order to enjoy:
1. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
2. Napoleon Dynamite

Favorite movies that make you laugh out loud no matter how many times you have watched them:
1. Bridget Jones' Diary
2. Best In Show

Your favorite "Guilty Pleasures":
1. Independence Day
2. Only You

Favorite movies you have seen so many times, you can recite all the lines:
1. The Princess Bride (although truly - what Mormon can't?)
2. Pride and Prejudice (long version)

Movies that "Opened your eyes."
1. The Mummy (just wanted to see if you were paying attention)
1. Hotel Rwanda or Shawshank Redemption
2. Schindler's List

Most Overrated
1. Atonement
2. Dr. Zhivago - maddening!!!

What were the last 2 movies you watched (my list doesn't include any from the endless slew of kids movies we watch):
1. Sunshine (the one about the sun)
2. Leatherheads

Favorite "smart" movies:
1. Good Will Hunting or The Spanish Prisoner
2. Lost in Translation

Your spouse's/significant other's favorites:
1. Gladiator
2. Beverly Hills Ninja

Your all time favorites:
1. Pride and Prejudice (5 hour version)
2. Lord of the Rings series

And I choose to tag.......oh heck. Whoever reads this. I think it's pretty telling to see what a person watches or reads *ahem* (Ammon).

MUST. GO. FASTER.

2008-04-30T09:47:00.002-07:00

84 words

Speedtest

I must say, this is AFTER I tried at least 7 times. Oh, and thanks heaps Anya for giving me something new to obsess over. =)

HAPPY DAY!

2008-04-25T18:47:00.005-07:00

WE HAD A POO-POO IN THE POTTY!!

Point of clarification - ADDY did, not me. Or at least not recently. Well, earlier today. Oh never mind.

The SERIOUSLY Fun BookClub

2008-04-23T07:12:00.004-07:00

This is the excellent book we read this month for book club. I highly recommend.

Here's a summary of topics we covered on Tuesday night:

Chat chat chat chat book deep discussion Anti-Mormons chat chat book book book book deep discussion deep discussion book. Boobs boobs underwear boobs bras book book book childbirth boobs underwear bras fertility sex deep discussion chat chat C-sections Vback boobs sex chat chat.

Good times!

Cake and Genetics

2008-04-21T18:20:00.011-07:00

After a lengthy period of recent introspection, I have concluded that I must have a genetic predisposition towards 1) either going wildly over the top in everything I do, or 2) pooping out entirely. Although truth be told, I haven't a clue where I get this from. I really can't think of anyone else in my family that is like this. From whence it came, I knoweth not, but I am the most psycho extremist I know. The funny thing is that even with this brilliant insight, I haven't the foggiest what to do about it.
I'll be sitting there feverishly gluing popsicle sticks on to cute laminated elephants, wondering how and why I ever got here and vowing to never do it again. And....of course I immediately sign up to do something else equally ridiculous. Which I either complete with vigor, or cancel at the last possible moment because I realized it was insane to agree to it in the first place. WHY????

Case in point: Addy's 2nd birthday. These two pictures ought to give you a sense of place:

Doesn't this look like a totally mellow and laid back Princess party? Hahahahhahaha. Hahahahahaha. Hahahahahaha. I don't think anyone has ever said that about any party I've done.

And in case you weren't sure whether or not I am a complete nutjob.....yes, that is a castle cake, and yes, we did stay up until 2am trying to get the right color frosting. And no, we did not succeed. We were going for gray and it came out kind of a puce purply bluish bruise gray. It was still cute though.

Lest you think I am alone in my neuroses, rest assured my husband and I are closely matched in this department. Exhibit A: Cardboard Castle complete with drawbridge, flag, and lookout towers. Notice Addy's crown in the 2nd pic. Classic.

As you can see from this shot, Addy was not at her most pleasant during the festivities. Do you think it could possibly have something to do with the extreme amount of overstimulation inflicted on an unsupsecting toddler by her parents? I didn't think so either. But she and her little princess friends sure looked adorable!

The great present opening. I don't know if you can hear it in the background, but some funny yukster (*ahem*) said something about me and babies and I all I know is that I heard the two words in one sentence and my brain froze and went into survival mode. (me plugging my ears) LALALALALALALALA.

Oh thank the stars.

2008-04-20T14:54:00.000-07:00

Take the Quiz here!

On vacay...

2008-04-13T19:50:00.004-07:00

I wish we were going here:

But we will actually be here:

Teasing....UT has it's own special beauty. Take that any way you choose. =)

Love,
Micaela

Happy 2nd Birthday Sweet Pickle!

2008-04-03T21:24:00.003-07:00

Adeline Reese Crapo, born Monday, April 3, 2006 at 7:22pm. Weighing in at 3lbs, 2 0z, and 15" long.
We love you, Adeline! We can't believe it has been two years since you were born, or how tiny you were! We were so happy to have you come to our family, and we are so grateful for the laughs and sweetness and love you have provided since. It has been such an experience to watch you grow and develop and see your amazing personality come out. You are goofy and funny and sly and stubborn and sweet and affectionate and smart and charming. We feel honored to be your parents.
With much love,
Mommy and Daddy

Tinkle Tinkle Mom!

2008-04-01T19:45:00.003-07:00

I really have a lot to say, and I'd really like to do a full out blog entry with birthday pics of Addy and a thorough commentary on my life right now, but I just don't have the energy so let's sum up:

Addy's bday party was fab and fun. Cute kids, cute presents, cute parents. Pictures to come.
I have a giant zit the size of Connecticut on my left cheek. Punishment for eating 1000 mini Peanut Butter Cups this weekend.
Addy is going through sleep trauma's (hence the zero energy), but she is asleep right now; I am genius. Muwwhahahaha! Freedom!
I have a new desk at work. For the first time in my life, I have a WINDOW! It's sad how happy that makes me, but I can't even tell you what a difference it makes to at least be able to look at the drug deals happening outside the Social Security building instead of a brown fabric cube wall. I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing.

And....I'm spent. Have a happy evening.

My Angelic GENIUS CHILD!

2008-03-26T18:36:00.007-07:00

Has any child ever looked so sweet? Addy also said her first full, complete sentence the other day. We were sitting on the couch together hanging out like little buddies, and she turns to me and says (with perfect grammer I might add)...

"You are my mommy; I am Addy".

I nearly died. How sweet is that? And how smart!!!! Seroiusly, I know everyone thinks their kid is smart, but come on, you have to admit that this was pretty advanced for a not quite 2 year old. Oh bless her little love heart.

I'm not only so pleased with and her sweet Easter outfit, but the fact that I managed to pull off this hairdo! PRECIOUS!

...now gimme some candy!!!!!!

2008-03-13T11:22:00.009-07:00

This is a bad time of year to have sworn off candy and chocolate (and really anything that tastes good). It has only been approx. 71 hours and 4 mintues since I had sugar and I swear I'm dying. And starving.

I don't think I'm doing myself any favors here, but I just had to post my "sugar wish list"...mmmmmmmm.

March is an especially bad time for a diet, because my all time fave candy in the world only comes around once a year...Cadbury Mini Eggs. This is what I imagine heaven would taste like.

If I get really desperate, I may just pull a Carol Johnson (mom) and start eating straight out of the sugar bowl - although I prefer sugar cubes myself. Horses are no dummies.

I like to eat apples and bananas

2008-03-11T20:02:00.003-07:00

No, actually, I just like to eat donuts. Let's see....who's child is this?

It's really hard to be mad at her for being such a mess when she looks so hilarious and cute. She looks very serious here because it took mom awhile before she just gave up and gave her the whole donut. Bad mommy!

Food has been a serious challenge in our house lately. I'm trying to be good and stop eating like a wild hyena, Addy will hardly eat anything, and both Ammon and I have given up cooking because we're too blasted tired to do anything beyond cereal. MAYBE some ramen on a good day.

SO. That being said, you'll understand why I caved and let Addy have the whole chocolate donut (that and the 2 yr old tantrums have begun - holy hannah something evil has possessed my child), and, why she ate ONLY THIS for dinner tonight:

I wish I were kidding. I tried an orange, a nummy hamburger, pretzels, juice, grape-nuts, etc. In the end, only using her little fingers as a scooper to have I swear a cup of some good old Heinz ketchup would make her happy. Please don't call CPS on me! I really am trying to be a good mom that encourages nutrition! =)

Addy 2 - Mom 0

Mmmmmmm cake

2008-03-10T12:53:00.003-07:00

Well this is certainly interesting. Not sure these descriptions all fit me, but I do love my lemon cake.

You Are a Lemon Cake

Strong, sexy, and overpowering.

You know who you are, and you're not afraid to show the world your fabulous self.

You're confident, charming, and extremely popular.

What Kind of Cake Are You?

Ohhhh chicken lips and lizard hips

2008-03-03T16:57:00.007-07:00

These two pictures make me laugh so hard. Addy just looks so confused! This is sweet Ella who had a hat party with Addy on Oscar night.

ZOO DAY!

So you know how I've been complaining since we moved here that the weather is insane? It was 75 at the zoo and I have a sweet little sunburn to prove it. 16 hours later, I woke up to SNOW on the ground, and the temperature gauge reading 20 degrees. EH? Do we live on the moon or what?

Addy and Daddy looking at the horsies/zebra's.

This is Adeline imitating the polar bear licking his chops. And yes, that is me doing the same. Sorry.

Sorry, Lindsay, but camels are seriously unattractive animals. And, not a little frightening. I swear to you one of them was absolultely staring right at me.

Here we are, having our staring contest.

Addy watching the penguins intently.

And the best part of zoo day: watching the other parents slowly clue in to the pair of otters that were "playing". "Wow, kids, look at that! Those otters are really having a good time...hmmm, that one really doesn't want to let go....ummmm.....OHHHHH......KIDS!!! We are going to see the polar bears now!!!" You could tell the ones that weren't quite ready for the "birds and the bees", or "playful otters" discussion.

Annnnnnnd in other news:

Addy's vocabulary is growing exponentially, probably thanks to the older kids she hangs out with during the week. My new favorites are "Happy Happy Day!", "Funny Mommy!", and "Poopy Doggies. No no no no no! Bad dog!". I love how she announces everything she's doing too. "I running!", or "I sit down" which usually sounds like she's saying something else.

She's also started talking along when we say prayers. It's very sweet. Random note - she just streaked naked down the hall post-bath cackling her head off. She must be my child. =) Have a great night!

Senor Oscar of the Grouchiness

2008-02-25T20:56:00.010-07:00

I know I should have more socially conscious and/or intellectual things to discuss today, but I positively cannot resist posting the faves and freak shows from what I thought was an otherwise very boring Oscar ceremony. Except for that joke Jon Stewart made about how now that Oscar is 80 yrs old, that makes him the automatic republican party nominee. Hah! In case you didn't get that, John McCain, he means you are OLD.

Frankly though, there really weren't that many super exciting outfits to discuss either. BAH. Doesn't anyone want to make a statement anymore, a la Bjork? Alas.

FAVES

(of course) HELEN MIRREN

Who always looks smashing. If I am half that hot when I'm 60 odd years...heck, if I'm half that hot NOW I'd be happy. For you doubters out there - you try pulling off red satin and see what you have to say.

MARION COTILLARD

(adorable French girl that won Best Actress). I looked at this for a very long time before I decided I LOVE it. Argue if you must, but I love this mermaid fish quilted craziness, and good heavens can she pull it off.

JESSICA ALBA

What a fab color on her. No pregnant girl should look this adorable. I think I must hate her.

IFFY

Jennifer Hudson - when she was presenting I couldn't stop thinking about how great she looked, and then...I saw this picture. Suffice it to say - not the most flattering I've seen. Jennifer, hasn't anyone told you never to have a picture taken straight on? ANGLE girl! Angle.

Imagine looking at those boobs with 3-D glasses on. Oy.

FREAK SHOW. Alright that's excessive. We'll call this category NOT GOOD.

And the nominees are:

RENEE ZELLWEGER

For seriously un-cute hair. And I could post at least 12 other photos of her in a tight strapless dress in a variety of colors. My favorite comment was her comparison to one of the Von Trapp sons. Priceless, and so apt.

NICOLE KIDMAN

For excessive use of jewels. Good land woman! At some point, didn't you look at yourself and think "I look a trifle sparkly for any one person. 1399 carats is just one too many". Maybe she was in a competition?

*** Disclaimer: NEVER let it be said that I don't adore and worship Heidi Klum. In my eyes, she can do no wrong. BUT, in the interest of being a fair and impartial judge, I have to put my personal feelings aside:

HEIDI KLUM

For a bun that is REALLY hoping for a spot in the Guiness Book of World Records. Cinnabon is jealous. On the other hand though, you have to give her credit for acknowledging that this sucker might have been a wee over the top. She was quoted as saying, "I have snacks stored up there". Oh how I love Heidi Klum.

TILDA SWINTON

For being just plain scary. She looks like she is very cool and avant garde and doesn't care what anyone thinks which is her shtick and to hell with all you sheep! Whatever kind of statement she is trying to make (or making a statement by NOT making a statement), she proves the point that natural is not always better. Maybe it's cool to look like a very tall androgynous young man wearing what looks to be a black velour shroud minus an arm. I don't know. I'm pretty sure I dyed my hair that color once, and it was just as frightening.

Does it make me shallow that I just spent 45 mins criticizing other people's clothes? Glass house, what?

It could be fleas. I remember my bulldog had fleas. He was grumpy for weeks.

2008-02-22T11:25:00.002-07:00

Grrrrrrr. I am prickly today. Just a warning.

Note to self: no more customer service phone calls today.

Thank you, Sam.

2008-02-21T17:33:00.002-07:00

I think my political views are best expressed in the following video.

Rubber Ducky

2008-02-17T23:15:00.001-07:00

Look at these adorable little girls in their bathing glory. Notice how Addy is already sucking in -good girl. =)

Our Valentine's get shipped by Priority Mail.

Beware of what lives on...

2008-01-14T20:56:00.000-07:00

Dear Cassy,

I'm really sorry if this is hard for you to understand, but I've felt for a long time now that this picture shouldn't be kept from the world any longer. You hair is teased too well, your lace too voluminous, and your pumps too ivory to be hidden.
Our nation must be reminded of the beliefs we once clung to (and the dyed-to-match shoe craze) that we have struggled so long and hard to overcome. We must never forget!!

Thank you for no longer dressing like a crazed Aquanet-huffing lunatic. The post 80's world thanks you as well.

Your loving sister,

Micaela

P.S. It is to your credit that even with this absolute crackfest of an outfit, you still look adorable.

When a problem comes along, you must whip it.

2008-01-09T18:49:00.002-07:00

80's Dance Party Sum-up:
For future reference, I know now to have our next 80's party well into February to avoid post holiday travel and excessive vomiting. I got a teensy bit freaked out right beforehand because so many people ended up having to cancel due to the sicklies, BUT...those that were still able to come made this party AWESOME. Thanks dudes (I can't say that without wanting to gag myself with a spoon)! And I must say, I outdid even myself on the decor. I think the framed photo of Princess Di & Chuck really added something special. I just love having a party with people that love being a retard for the evening as much as I do. Truly - there is something very liberating about throwing your dignity out the window and belting "Straight Up" as loud as you can. And wearing neon. Also supremely liberating.

Along with many hundreds of other great plans I had, I neglected to give out awards at our little fete, so here they are...

LEAD VOCALS: Mark V. (Risky Business) for his stunning sounds on, well basically every song, but specifically "Take On Me" by A-Ha. That high note is a doozy.

BUTT BARING DARING: Ashley Cox (Jane Fonda) for having more guts than a Thanksgiving turkey. Seriously - check out the slideshow.

FLASHDANCE: Rachel Anderson (pink sweatshirt and headband - always in mid-complicated dance move). I have never in my life seen a pregnant girl shake her money maker like this. I wish I'd had a bucket of water ready.

TOO COLD: This award goes out to Jared C. for not only the outstanding and totally useless ability to remember so many lyrics written (or maybe just sung, no...rapped, er...spoken) by Vanilla Ice, but for adding the appropriate moves and attitude to go with. Honorable mention to Spencer Anderson for equal willingness to humiliate oneself. Yo,

V.I.P. HUMILIATION NATION: Since both Mark and Ashley already have awards, this has to go to Anya Crace for sporting a pair of jeans that should never, under any circumstances, be forced on human eyes. My retinas are still burning. 2nd place for Most Hideous Pants goes to Andy Eldridge for those cotton hammer pants. Again...needles-in-eyes.

SHEER STAMINA: Meggan Hulme, who was still gyrating hours (ok not that long) after the first partiers bid us adieu.

MOST REALISTIC: If I didn't know better, I would swear that Teresa Morris still lived in the 80's because she just looked soooo....effortless. The hair! The bangs! The long sweater with kitties (or bears?)! The pegged pants! The hot pink belt! Absolute perfection.

TRIVIA NERD: Skylar. I cannot for the life of me figure out how or why one person could have such an inordinate amount of He-Man, Master of the Universe knowledge at such ready disposal.

BIGGEST NERD, BAR NONE: To Ammon, for actually googling solutions to the Rubik's Cube. During the party. While everyone else was doing karaoke.

I've run out of ideas for other awards, but the rest of you should know how much I appreciated and admired your work as well. Truly, YOU are what made this night a success. Before the party, I forced everyone into giving me pictures of themselves in those lost Wonder Years, which I made into our Wall of Shame.

10 non sequiturs

2008-01-02T14:47:00.000-07:00

***

Nuts! I just accidentally bought some shoes on Ebay. I HATE it when I do that. I know - it seems impossible, but I managed to find a way to UNINTENTIONALLY buy things.

***

So I am getting ready for our 80's party on Saturday night - if you want to come, the invite is on Evite!!! I'm listening to my playlist right now..."She told me her name was Billie Jean as she crossed the scene".

I swear I've had more fun getting ready for this than I will at the actual party. I found this great picture of Gorbachev, and added my artistry to reflect the mood of the decade. Hopefully everyone knows this is tongue-in-cheek.

***
I need ideas for our book club next year. Suggestions? It needs to be very non-yucky and offensive. I'm already going to suggest The World Is Flat (an excellent read by the way - changed the way I am thinking about the election this year), but I want some others.

("What I know is that to me you look like you're having fun..")

***

I just bought myself a Captain Caveman mousepad. I can't wait for it to come. It made me wonder though if anyone else would find this amusing. I'm guessing not.

("C'mon feel the noise; girls rock your boys; we'll get wild, wild, wild.")

***

I am STILL thinking of things to put on my 100 factoids list. Ridiculous. I either need to get a life or stop being so self absorbed. I'll (of course) happily share them upon request.

("...and girls, they wanna have fu-hun")

***
Warning - political views forthcoming: I have no idea who I want to vote for this year. I think I've narrowed it down to four - and please no booing and hissing about Hillary. =) I know a lot of you think she's Satan, but I think that position has already been filled by, I don't know...Giuliani? kidding. I also think Ron Paul is kind of a weirdo, but don't tell my in-laws that. lol!

I'm surprised that I'm leaning towards Obama on the Democratic side. If I were to base my decision totally on looks, it would be between Edwards and Romney, although I think Romney edges out Edwards for the more "Presidential" look. Obama is a reasonably attractive guy but his voice is too deep. I wonder what criteria the majority of Americans use in making their voting decisions?

("Straight up now tell me do you wanna love me forever?")

***

If any of you are dying to know, the Christmas wish list worked like a charm. I received the following items from my list:

I wore the sweater on Sunday, and the chocolates were gone in about...2 hours (thanks Mom!). I traded the red Crocs in for silver ones (thanks Ammon!). The apron was a different one and looked a little silly on me due to a certain feature of my anatomy that got in the way, but I exchanged it for some other cool stuff at Anthropologie (thanks Christian!).

("Her name is Rio and she dances on the sand; just like that river flowing through the dusty land")

***

Someone needs to spank Ammon for not reading my blog more often. For shame, husband! =)

("Every time I think of you I feel a shot right through with a bolt of blue")

***

Addy was sooooo funny the other day - she put on my Uggs, but with the toes facing backward and tried tooling around the house. What a little love. This is her cute silver New Year's dress that I am so proud of myself for finding at a secondhand store (it's Gymboree), and yes, those are my legs in leggings in the background of the 2nd pic. I'm prepping for the 80's party, and they are darn comfortable.

("Iiiiiiiiiiiiii get weak, when you look at me: weak...")

***

I have wasted so much time today blogging when I should've been working. Bah. I'm really hungry.

("Karma karma karma karma karma chameleon")

Funny ha-ha or Funny Sad? You be the judge.

2007-12-17T21:27:00.000-07:00

Lately, it's been way too easy to get all in a dither and let myself get caught up in everyday stresses. I was thinking about this the other day and then it occurred to me how many HILARIOUS things happen to me on a daily (well usually) basis. Thank heavens there are things to laugh at. Here are a few that happened recently:

1. I was at a friends house (*cough* Diana), and her 18 mth old daughter honked me. HONKED. If you don't know what that means, does it help to know that she followed it up by saying "boob!"? I know Diana was a TINY bit embarassed, but it was beyond hysterical.

The culprit trying to look innocent:

2. While getting her diaper changed the other day, Addy grabbed one of the wipes, wiped her little bum, and then....blew her nose with the same one (luckily it was a non-poopy one). Right concept, wrong application. Ahh my precocious little nugget.

3. I was feeling really proud of myself for how smoooothly my virtual garage sale on eBay went, until I learned that I had sent a pair of Banana Republic women's pants to the guy in Michigan who bought the book "Next", and his book to the woman in Florida who was expecting pants. They were both very confused, but luckily very gracious. Gads. I need a nap.

4. Ammon built a "SnowMom" in the backyard, at least 7 feet high, that had an extra set of , ummm....parts that a snowMAN usually doesn't have. It was especially funny when the neighbor's giant dog decided to come over and christen her "leg".

5. Ammon has become a Stay At Home Dad for now, which is not hilarious at first blush, until you see what Addy looks like by the end of each day (still in PJ's, hair all gummed up with something nasty, etc.). On this particular day, she decided that peanut butter is the new black and her bear needed an overhaul, especially around the eyes.

Just a few other random photos...

Adeline has also decided that boots are a must have for this season:

This is what happens in our house if you are bad - the hair cops come to town and make you look ridiculous:

My little elf

This is not funny ha ha, but it looked really cool - Ammon took this out our upstairs bathroom window. These things are beautiful, but they also look like death on a stick.

Merry Christmas!

100 Factoids - Round 2 DONE!

2007-12-05T22:38:00.000-07:00

After reading so many of these, it's fun to see some of the reasons why you are friends with people. I KNOW Marie and I are friends because we both hate Appleby's. =) Anyway, I've been writing things down over the last few days...let's see if I can come up with 100.

1. I have a serious phobia of ear wax.

2. I have a very large scar on my left thigh from a coffee spill when I was 2.

3. Someday I'd really like to write a book.

4. One of my all time favorite movies is Independence Day. Mock if you must, but I stand by it.

5. My hair has been my personal plague all my life.

6. I love winter. But only when it's cold.

7. I ADORE making lists.

8. I do my makeup in the car, including liquid eyeliner.

9. I am SO a night person.

10. I love my feet.

11. I am always looking forward to the “next big event” (marriage, kids, trip, etc.), sometimes at the expense of the present.

12. I don't mind cleaning toilets, but I HATE doing the dishes.

13. I have always secretly wished I was an actress or a singer. Sometimes I think about what I would wear on a red carpet.

14. I could eat cookies all day, everyday. And then cake. Mmmmm bakery cake.

15. I am not photogenic.

16. I wish I were smarter.

17. I love funny people. If you aren't funny at all, I'd probably rather not talk to you.

18. I LOVE to travel. My greatest wish is to travel somewhere new every year.

19. I have green eyes, but most people call them hazel. It bugs me.

20. I think my husband is the only person I know that 100% “gets” me.

21. My life has been forever changed by DVR.

22. I have been engaged twice and proposed to three times.

23. I still adore Erasure - their's was the first concert I went to, and went to 2 more times.

24. I am a sweat-er. Not a sweater. A sweat-er. I sweat a lot when I’m nervous.

25. I adore flip-flops and hoodies.

26. I hate it when people add an “H” to my name. (Michaela instead of Micaela). You’d be surprised how many utility companies/catalogs/banks take it upon themselves to “fix” the spelling of my name.

27. I am a shop-a-holic. And a make-up-a-holic.

28. There is no sweeter sound in the world than my daughter’s voice.

29. My favorite thing in the world is to buy presents for other people. It’s fun figuring out the perfect gift.

30. Watching inane TV is my greatest relaxation.

31. I cannot get through a day without Diet Coke. I prefer fountain with fresh limes (The Cheesecake Factory’s is the best), but I’ll take what I can get.

32. I am very impulsive, but in both good and bad ways.

33. When I was pregnant, I ordered a CASE of Hostess orange cupcakes online.

34. I like the way I feel when I exercise, but I hate actually doing it.

35. I love hydrangeas.

36. I have more speeding tickets and accidents than anyone I know.

37. I really really miss first kisses.

38. I have had the same ATM pin for 10 years.

39. I once broke my coccyx trestle jumping.

40. I could surf eBay for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours.

41. I can pretty safely say that I will never (again) live in Utah.

42. Celery is the dumbest fake vegetable. It has no right to exist.

43. When I was pregnant, I threw up so hard I wet my pants, on many occasions and in many locations.

44. I cannot stand it when people can't spell or use poor grammar.

45. The sight or smell of beets make me sick.

46. I start looking foward to Christmas in about July.

47. I love playing card games with my family. It's hilarious.

48. I am a sympathetic cryer.

49. I am a shoes and purses snob.

50. I hate the words sneakers, soda, and nostril. I know there are more...

51. I miss being at least semi athletic.

52. I love it when my house is clean and organized, but lately we're just shooting for sanitary.

53. I'd like to own a goat someday.

54. My feelings get hurt really easily.

55. I desperately want more kids, but the thought of being pregnant again is beyond terrifying.

56. Sometimes I still have dreams about old boyfriends and wake up feeling a little nostalgic.

57. I like to think I'm a good friend.

58. I can eat an entire canister of Pik-Niks in one sitting.

59. I'm not as 100% honest as I would like to be.

60. For the most part, I think I have pretty good taste, just...generally.

61. I hate Appleby's. HATE.

62. Cats + Me = Not a pretty picture.

63. I never go to bed when I should (note the time).

64. It drives me BANANAS when people don't have good bathroom etiquette.

65. I love my friends. I miss my old friends, I love my new ones. I could not make it through life without friends.

66. I think my mom, my dad, and Ammon are 3 of the smartest people I know.

67. Nutella and pretzels is probably what Adam and Eve ate in the Garden before they got kicked out.

68. I have a very addictive personality. It's a good thing I'm LDS.

69. I am a bit of an intellectual snob. I don't understand people that don't read or THINK.

70. Tofu is only good in fruit smoothies, and MAYBE in Phad Thai. But that's it.

71. Ankle boots are the modern version of The Emperor's New Clothes.

72. I am a very vivid dreamer, and I almost always remember them the next day (ask me!).

73. Target and Costco are my two favorite places to shop.

74. I am a chronic insomniac.

75. I like calendars.

76. I enjoy shopping for absolutely anything.

77. I have not finished my freshman year of college scrapbooks.

78. I am a big procrastinator.

79. I pierced my upper ear on my mission.

80. I gave my brother a swirly once.

81. Other than my hair, my skin has been my lifelong plague. No one should have acne at 31!

82. I would do a lot for a Cafe Rio Salad.

83. It drives me nuts when people express politcal views from the pulpit. Not the forum, people!

84. It also drives me nuts when people assume that if you are a Mormon, you are a Republican, or should be.

85. I must have been scarred in my formative years, because I get oddly attached to friends and feel jealous of other friendships they have. It's a problem that probably needs therapy.

86. Popcorn might be my all time favorite food.

87. I really want to be a SAHM, but I worry that once it happens, I'll go nuts.

88. It weirds me out a little bit that my bishop is younger than me.

89. I spent one summer in Alaska working at a fishing resort.

90. I secretly listen to Fergie.

91. In high school, I was voted Most Outgoing.

92. I am secretly a home-bodied introvert.

93. I always overcommit myself and then want to cancel later.

93. The Outback's Sinful Sundae is the best dessert anywhere. Delish.

94. I wish I knew what my "calling" was. Some specific trait or skill. I'm a little envious of those who sing or do photography or are brilliant professors.

95. I am stressed right now about singing in church on Sunday (not ready/congested).

96. I'm so excited for Addy to actually "get" her first Christmas. Last year was basically lost on her.

97. I eat cereal for dinner a lot. That sounds really good...

98. I have the cutest, funniest child imaginable.

99. My husband is the bestest ever because he lets me make him a daily chores list (while he is SAHD), and he actually does it, and like that I give him the direction! Bless him.

100. I love people and I love to hear all about other people. So take this as your invitation to make a 100 factoids list.

Virtual Garage Sale

2007-12-01T10:33:00.000-07:00

Most of you know of my intense love affair with eBay. I've decided that the time has come to take our relationship to the next level and have...an online garage sale. I know, it's a big step.

If you get bored, or would like a voyeuristic view into the life of the Crapo's, take a gander. Be warned - I'm looking over my list, and there is some seriously random stuff in there.

My Seller ID is: addysmom06. If you do an advanced search, you can search by seller name. Or, click here: http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZaddysmom06 But that would be too easy.

Have no fear - I won't be offended if you don't bid on anything.

**Note - No, I will not make you pay shipping in you live within 15 miles of me. =) I MIGHT even personally deliver it to you. Would things sell better if I offered fresh cookies too?

...my two front teeth***

2007-11-17T19:24:00.000-07:00

***this entry has been added to. I need therapy. If you can correctly identify WHICH items I added - you need therapy.

It's more than a little possible that this is both tacky and a serious social faux pas, but...I'm willing to live with that. Take it as an interesting insight into me and my tastes.

PLEASE NOTE: This post is not meant to elicit feelings of guilt and/or obligation on anyone's part (other than who drew my name for Christmas! ha) to buy me a present. I'm just lazy and think it'll be easier to blog my Wish List. Also note - this is a WISH list. I have no false notions that someone will be giving me a new iPod this year, or that I desperately NEED any of these things. It's just an assortment of things I would enjoy.

P.S. - my mama asked me to rank these in some fashion, so if you see a :) that means I really like that one...

College Student Budget ($0-$20)

I love Amy Sedaris, and I think this book of hers on hospitality looks very entertaining, and full of excellent advice, such as filling your medicine cabinet with marbles to bust nosey guests. And where did she get that apron? :)

I have an obsession with nightshirts (and PJ's - see below). Who knows why.
This one from Old Navy is fun but I like almost any - although I draw the line at housecoat or sheer and clingy. Anything in between will do nicely.

Can you ever go wrong with Chocolate?
We don't have a See's in CO which is really depressing.
The YUMMIEST ever are Mocha's and Bordeaux's.

A really good cookbook. :)

A friend recommended William's Sonoma which sounded good to me.

Little more ($20-$50)

Apron's from Anthropologie
Not necessarily this certain one. I just like their aprons.

For those sad mornings when my eye bags could hold entire golf balls, I would love an eye mask, like this one from Sephora.

I give up on this picture - just search at sephora.

Coach Business Card Holder :)
Note - only buy these at an outlet. Not worth it for full price.

Croc's (MJ's)

I really have no idea what color I would want - they just look comfy and not quite as hideous as the regular ones. It'd be interesting to see what someone else would pick for me (size 7).

Not for the unemployed ($50-$100)

J.Crew turtleneck sweater
I have fantasies about owning a sweater this color.

(royal violet XL)

I also have fantasies about owning a silver purse (I know; strange fantasies for a girl to have). And you will never believe this, but I actually like a purse under $100 (on sale but whatever)! The brand is The Sak, found on Endless.

Pajamas. If I was allowed to work in pajamas, I truly would.

I love these from Garnet Hill (the ones on the chair).

(Pink Cherry Blossom XL)

Ammon has finally convinced me that flannel sheets are a winter must-have. I keep sneaking out and sleeping in our guest bed (which has them), so I think it might be a boon to our marriage to get a set of kings. Any will do, but Garnet Hill has fun ones. Call me nuts, but I like the orange.

Pipe Dream (ummm, let's not discuss)

GPS :):):):)

This is more a "necessary act of goodwill to all men" than a "wish". Anyone that has had the misfortune to cross my path while I'm on the phone, putting on eyeliner, and looking for street names while trying to drive will agree. And if I'm being truly candid and self deprecating, I'll have to admit that not only am I an extreme and unrepentant multitasker, but I have also have an even poorer sense of direction than Idgie (the dog) does.

Perhaps we could start a GPS For Micaela Fund For The Benefit Of All Colorado Residents.

iPod

I already own an iPod (circa 2004), so it may seem a wee materialistic to have one on my list. In my defense, I will tell you that it is getting tiresome having to hook it up to my portable hamster in a wheel everytime I want to listen to a song without a charger. That is one sad battery. Also, everytime I turn it on (after the requisite 4 minutes of contemplating whether it's going to obey or not), I have to remind it that I speak English. It thinks I'm Chinese, or, it wants me to be.

And since we're dreaming....almost anything in a little blue box.

I especially like these earrings and this necklace (with an M engraved on it). I like the idea of a necklace I could wear everyday. Sorry for the wonky pictures - I haven't figured out how to trick the Tiffany's website into letting me copy normal images.

In Doubt, or just Lazy (any and all dollar amounts accepted):

Can't beat a Gift Card (Nordstrom's cards are the MOST coveted):)

I can always find something I love at any of these places:

My celebrity look-alikes...

2007-11-04T21:01:00.000-07:00

Hmmm...methinks this doesn't work quite as well as one might hope. Behold:

%1

A whole passle of pictures

2007-11-01T15:44:00.000-07:00

I've thinking about all the clever and witty stories I could write about each of these pictures, but as I continue to wait for inspiration to strike, more things happen, more pics are taken, I'm getting really behind, yadayadayada.

So, this is a grand summary in photos of everything interesting we've done in the last month. Or four?

August

(sidenote - Grandpa Dean and Grandma Passiko visited this month...or...sometime around then, and somehow I don't have a single picture! I don't know how that happened. But it was great to see them!)

I really have no clue what is going on here, but I thought it looked pretty funny. Is she licking the bucket? Sniffing it? How does one understand the workings of a toddler's mind?

Lucy and Addy discover the front window.

Now this is a dog who enjoys her privacy.

Our trip to Seattle (September)

Addy had a fabulous time at the airport, and mom and dad had a fabulous time on the plane - a miracle considering the 2 hour flight delay (yeah Benadryl!).

Darling new little nephew, Bowen. A very large bed for a very tiny person.

Yeeeeee! Haircuts at Tammy's! (I think that was the sound she was making)

Arctic Willow and dad Kevin

Baby Sumo - Sam (mom Neoma) vs. Willow (mom Carol). A tough call.

Addy and her friend Noah on the way to the Aquarium. Binki's (bikini's?) and holding hands. Aaaaah young love.

And, October...

Ammon the master builder made this fun swing for Addy that she adores. You can't see her face, but she is saying "Yeeeeeeee!!" again.

This is what happens when Daddy's stay home and Mommy's go to work: Ketchup.

Grandma Faye and Grandpa Hugh made the trek from UT - at the Butterfly Pavilion.

My cherubic child.

Addy learned how to fly like a butterfly (sting like a bee? OK that was unforgivably bad).

HALLOWEEN!

At the ward trunk-or-treat. How sensible! Rather than hauling a heavy bucket around for miles in the dark freezing your tuckus off, you just take candy out of everyone's parked car. Genius!

THE FLY

Ammon would like to point out that the purple silly straw in his mouth is actually a proboscis. Alrighty.

This reminds me of all our family pictures - there's always at least one kid crying. Addy is here with her friends Ella the baby chick, and Kyla a.k.a. Pebbles.

Wild pumpkin carving. Sklyer is demonstrating in the photo below what Crapo Pumpkin carving is all about:

The Sawzall.

"What in the name of all things living are these??"

The end result: a masterful job by all.

Ammon decided to freeze his tuckus off anyway because we definitely didn't have enough candy. Addy is still a little alarmed about what's going on here, but apparently she got the hang of it.

I think she liked Halloween, no?

Assistance, please.

2007-10-25T18:45:00.001-07:00

OK, enough already. I am WAY past being a 29 year old toddler. I need a new blog name and I have absolutely zero creative ideas at this point, so your suggestions would be wildly appreciated.
And for the LOVE will someone PLEASE put me out of my misery and teach me how to make a cute personalized blog with fun pictures and/or cute craftiness? I am begging you. Please have mercy. If I change my own blog background one more time into another boring template I will stick a hot poker in my eye.
Thanks! =)

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2007-10-25T18:18:00.000-07:00

Here's a little fact I bet you didn't know about me: once in college, I fell asleep so hard at one of the little study cubes in the library (BYU), that I totally drooled all over myself and the desk, but...because I woke up with 30 seconds to get to class, I didn't notice that I had drool all over my face until the whole campus had too.

I'm having a day like that where I'm pretty sure I will start snoring with my eyes open any minute. Mama needs sleep! And, it certainly is NOT going to improve anytime soon because... Duh duh duuuuuh:
This coming Sunday, I have what I consider the perfect storm in church callings:

THE TRIFECTA OF DEATH. Namely, trying to successfully complete the following assignments all in one Sunday:
Speaking in Sacrament meeting (the mother of all horrifying and potentially image damaging experiences one can experience)
Singing in the Choir
Teaching Relief Society

These may not sound so terrible at first blush, but keep in mind that each task has to be performed without: oversharing due to nervousness/extra time to fill, teaching false doctrine, offending any member of the bishopric or geriatric set, and being sure not to let inappropriate stories run rampant in RS (not as easy as you may think).
Given my current stress level and lack of sleep, this may be a challenge.

Looking at this an entirely different way, I could decide that having all these assignments makes me a "triple threat girl". Woman. Sister. Whatever.

Wish me luck. And wish Ammon luck too - he has an interview tomorrow and on Tuesday so keep him in your prayers!

Now I'm an Uber Cool Light-Weight Nerd. I like.

2007-10-15T21:01:00.001-07:00

I may never recover from the shame...

2007-10-14T21:47:00.000-07:00

Which Office Character Are You?
	You are Michael. Deep down, you are caring and good-natured, but you often express yourself in insensitive ways. Though you always try your hardest to make your talents be seen, you could use a little more self-awareness to avoid being awkward.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Nerd Quotient

2007-10-14T21:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I am relieved to know I am at least SOMEWHAT nerdy. I cannot be married to KING NERD (what I am guessing Ammon's score will be) and not have a little nerdiness. Besides, if Adeline grows up to be as big a nerd as her dad, I want to be sure I can relate.

Oh bother.

2007-10-05T15:12:00.001-07:00

May I just take a moment and give a brief shout-out to Blogger? Blogger rules. I am not always the best corresponder (Jessica J. - if you're out there...I still have an email from you in my inbox from last Jan. I hope you're doing well! I suck.), so it's fab to be able to look at everyone's blogs and see what's going on with very little effort on my part. And, you find out some interesting details also. For example - apparently Skylar was Ashley's first boyfriend. Who knew?? Never would've guessed.

Prepare yourself - today is Friday long blog day (say that 10 times fast and you get "blong". That sounds like a fun new word).

September has been a very exciting month in the Crapo household, especially since our typical biggest excitement in a given period of time is getting the mail.

WE.....

Went to a Rockie's game with the Cox's

Discovered our deep and abiding love of Corn Pops

Went to Anderson's Farm for the Fall Festival. It was fabulous fun. Flippin fantastic.

where Addy also discovered that she is obsessed with chickens.

Addy also completed her first maze with flying colors.

I'd also like to give a random but necessary shout out to goat's everywhere. I think I would like to own a goat.

Also, have you ever seen a llama run? I swear there is nothing funnier. I didn't get a good picture of it, but as our wagon started to pull away, the llama's started chasing us and I was literally crying I was laughing so hard.

Out of self pity, I was going to leave off this pic, but look closer and you'll see how cute Addy looks throwing her pumpkin. *sigh*. I'm such a good mom - I'll even sacrifice my vanity/dignity for love of my child.

Gourds.

This water barrel train is very cute and looked like a good idea at the time.

Seriously bad call. You could not pay me to do this again. My butt has never hurt so much in such a short period of time in my entire life. Look where Addy's nose is. But, it was pretty hilarious.

Kyla and Addy on the ride back to the cars.

In other news:

Addy has learned to blow her nose which is pretty amusing, but, she still prefers wiping snot on my pants.
We have learned the word "no". Excellent. Although, it is useful since she likes to yell it at the dogs a lot.
We also went to Seattle last week for my little nugget of a nephew's baby blessing, but I'm blogged out at present. Pics and stories to come later.

Who's ya daddy?

2007-10-04T20:19:00.000-07:00

Ammon...

Adeline...

Let's see. Related much?

Postscript: I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but there is just nothing cuter than a little naked baby bum.

Video killed the radio star. I want my MTV.

2007-09-23T11:37:00.000-07:00

By request (hi mom!), here is my Fall TV Viewing Schedule in grand detail.

Ratings chart:
C - For those of you looking for good clean fun only, the C is for Crass or Crude or not-Clean.
I/GP - Mind numbingly INANE, but a Guilty Pleasure, and therefore, allowed.

E - Eh. Not the greatest ever, but mildly entertaining and something to watch while I give myself a pedicure.

GT - A Good Time to be had by all.

L - Love, love, and more love.

These are the shows that will soon be booting Ammon's "Human Weapon" recordings: **Sidenote - if you ever want proof of the vast universe of differences between men and women, just look at their TV viewing preferences.

(If a date is listed, this is the premier)
Sunday 9/30 (recap on 9/23) Brothers & Sisters (ABC) E
Sunday 9/30 (recap on 9/23) Desperate Housewives (ABC) I/GP, C, GT

Monday 9/24 The Bachelor (ABC) I/GP, GT. I cannot emphasize enough how truly bad/ludicrous/insipid/ridiculous this show is, and yet, I cannot stop. Please don't make my mistake and start watching. You too will become hopelessly addicted.

Tuesdays Biggest Loser (NBC) E
Tuesday 10/2 Queer Eye (Bravo) GT, C

Wednesday 9/26 Private Practice (ABC) TBD. Leaning towards E. C?
Wednesdays Top Chef (Bravo) GT

Thursday 9/27 The Office (NBC) L, C (a wee bit)
Thursday 9/27 Grey's Anatomy (ABC) GT, C
Thursday 9/27 Ugly Betty (ABC) L
Thursdays Tim Gunn's Guide to Style (Bravo) E/GT

As for Fridays, I just cannot sit through Ghost Whisperer. I can't support a heroine who routinely looks like this:

"Hello sky. Are the aliens that kidnapped me and took my brain watching me? I miss them. My fake lashes feel floofy today. I'll think I'll have some lettuce."

Saturdays - I'm open to suggestions.

Other favorites that have been delayed because of who knows why:
Lost - (ABC) not till Feb 2008 L
Project Runway (Bravo) late 2007 L
Amazing Race (CBS) not due back until mid season - whatever that means. L

And finally, a few more ideas if you don't have enough already:

30 Rock is supposed to be really funny (Thursdays NBC 10/4).

Heroes - Monday 9/24 (NBC) I haven't gotten into this, but everyone that watches it, loves it.

Dancing with the Stars Monday 9/24 (ABC) I/GP, but occasionally entertaining.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition Sunday 9/30 (ABC) - always good for a healthy cry.

Girl put your records on, tell me your favorite song...

2007-09-19T15:48:00.001-07:00

soooooo stuck in my head right now.

I've been doing some very deep and insightful soul searching in the last 10 minutes, and have noticed a few troubling items. Please feel free to offer feedback/advice on any of these urgent questions.

1) Is it wrong that I looked up the season premiere of every show I love and wrote them down to be sure my DVR is properly queued up and ready to go?

2) Is it un-charitable to want to stage an intervention with someone and force them to go on Dr. Phil? Does he allow that?

3) How many Diet Cokes a day is too many?

4) Should you classify yourself as having being obsessive if you look at the same skirt and sweater online (at Boden)a minimum of 11 times a day - without actually purchasing them?

5) Is there a reason why I find ankle boots so horribly disturbing? Who exactly do these look good on? None of these women...

Oh Tyra.

It is even more concerning that these are the pressing issues I feel a need to blog about. I need therapy. And chocolate. Good land I am crabby! I think I will embrace my bad mood and have a Costco muffin. Have a sunshiney day! =)