Sunday, May 06, 2007

Tell me why I don't like Mondays, I wanna shooooooot the whole day down

OK I am going to cry now because I just wrote a really long and delicious blog complete with pictures and links, and then I lost it because I just had to check my Paris Hilton link. Damn Paris!

Anyway, I wanted to sum up my first day of work for you because it was so....I don't even know how to describe it. I'll just give you a list of the day's achievements and you can decide for yourself:

  1. Spit large chunk of Cliff bar on new co-worker - excellent first impression
  2. Tripped over poorly hemmed pants in front of boss
  3. Started period - while sitting at boss's desk
  4. Developed at least 147 blisters, all the size of Alaska, preventing me from walking without looking like a hobbled chicken
  5. Broke my favorite nail (left hand ring finger. v. sad)

Not quite what I imagined when I thought of what my first day would be like - I had been going for more of a blindingly sparkly first impression - much like Glinda the Good Banker. Alas. Things can only improve no?

Notes on previous blog: I love the Target wardrobe idea, and it would work great if I wasn't shaped like a VERY SHORT BEACH BALL. Only long legged woodland creatures can put on cheap clothes and make them look like Dolce & Gabbana. It takes some seriously good tailoring to make this arse look classy and professional. Really though - Target doesn't have clothese for short squatties. Very few places do I am discovering.

I am also adding two new features to my blog: Favorite Item of the Day (could be anything at all) and Celebrity News Story that made me Chuckle with Glee

Favorite Item(s) of the Day:

Best Magazine ever

Everyone needs a yellow purse, says I!

Celebrity New Story that made me Chuckle with Glee:

WAY too easy.

45 nights in jail for Paris