Who's ya daddy?

Ammon...

Adeline...

Let's see. Related much?

Postscript: I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but there is just nothing cuter than a little naked baby bum.

Video killed the radio star. I want my MTV.

By request (hi mom!), here is my Fall TV Viewing Schedule in grand detail.

Ratings chart:
C - For those of you looking for good clean fun only, the C is for Crass or Crude or not-Clean.
I/GP - Mind numbingly INANE, but a Guilty Pleasure, and therefore, allowed.

E - Eh. Not the greatest ever, but mildly entertaining and something to watch while I give myself a pedicure.

GT - A Good Time to be had by all.

L - Love, love, and more love.

These are the shows that will soon be booting Ammon's "Human Weapon" recordings: **Sidenote - if you ever want proof of the vast universe of differences between men and women, just look at their TV viewing preferences.

(If a date is listed, this is the premier)
Sunday 9/30 (recap on 9/23) Brothers & Sisters (ABC) E
Sunday 9/30 (recap on 9/23) Desperate Housewives (ABC) I/GP, C, GT

Monday 9/24 The Bachelor (ABC) I/GP, GT. I cannot emphasize enough how truly bad/ludicrous/insipid/ridiculous this show is, and yet, I cannot stop. Please don't make my mistake and start watching. You too will become hopelessly addicted.

Tuesdays Biggest Loser (NBC) E
Tuesday 10/2 Queer Eye (Bravo) GT, C

Wednesday 9/26 Private Practice (ABC) TBD. Leaning towards E. C?
Wednesdays Top Chef (Bravo) GT

Thursday 9/27 The Office (NBC) L, C (a wee bit)
Thursday 9/27 Grey's Anatomy (ABC) GT, C
Thursday 9/27 Ugly Betty (ABC) L
Thursdays Tim Gunn's Guide to Style (Bravo) E/GT

As for Fridays, I just cannot sit through Ghost Whisperer. I can't support a heroine who routinely looks like this:

"Hello sky. Are the aliens that kidnapped me and took my brain watching me? I miss them. My fake lashes feel floofy today. I'll think I'll have some lettuce."

Saturdays - I'm open to suggestions.

Other favorites that have been delayed because of who knows why:
Lost - (ABC) not till Feb 2008 L
Project Runway (Bravo) late 2007 L
Amazing Race (CBS) not due back until mid season - whatever that means. L

And finally, a few more ideas if you don't have enough already:

30 Rock is supposed to be really funny (Thursdays NBC 10/4).

Heroes - Monday 9/24 (NBC) I haven't gotten into this, but everyone that watches it, loves it.

Dancing with the Stars Monday 9/24 (ABC) I/GP, but occasionally entertaining.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition Sunday 9/30 (ABC) - always good for a healthy cry.

Girl put your records on, tell me your favorite song...

soooooo stuck in my head right now.

I've been doing some very deep and insightful soul searching in the last 10 minutes, and have noticed a few troubling items. Please feel free to offer feedback/advice on any of these urgent questions.

1) Is it wrong that I looked up the season premiere of every show I love and wrote them down to be sure my DVR is properly queued up and ready to go?

2) Is it un-charitable to want to stage an intervention with someone and force them to go on Dr. Phil? Does he allow that?

3) How many Diet Cokes a day is too many?

4) Should you classify yourself as having being obsessive if you look at the same skirt and sweater online (at Boden)a minimum of 11 times a day - without actually purchasing them?

5) Is there a reason why I find ankle boots so horribly disturbing? Who exactly do these look good on? None of these women...

Oh Tyra.

It is even more concerning that these are the pressing issues I feel a need to blog about. I need therapy. And chocolate. Good land I am crabby! I think I will embrace my bad mood and have a Costco muffin. Have a sunshiney day! =)

**Note - this cannot be sung or read; only crooned. "If you're goinnnnng to San Francisco...be sure to weaaaarrrrrrr some flowers in your hair"

This is arguably the worst song ever recorded. Just wanted to throw that out there.

Friday Night Confessional:
I watched Snakes on a Plane last night..................and that's all I'm going to say about that.

As you can see, Miss Bee officially won the Halloween costume contest, and by a fairly large margin. Interesting. Wouldn't have guessed. I'm still debating between that and the Peep because the Peep is just too good. I suppose the deciding factor will be whichever costume I can find again. I have zero recollection of where I found all these costumes.

Moving on then. Marie hasn't officially tagged me to do this, but she threatened to on her blog, so I decided to beat her to the punch. =) Although - it just occurred to me that stating this on her blog might have been the official tag. Wow - I need a life.

4 jobs I've had (I too have had way more than 4):
1) Orthodontist Assistant
2) Test Proctor at the BYU testing center - seriously good times
3) Care Provider (can't remember the title) at a home for severely mentally handicapped adults
4) Treasury Management Sales Consultant (I don't know what this means either)
**Honorable mention: I spent exactly 16 minutes as a waitress at some really gross steak place in Lake Forest Park (which is now a Blockbuster), but ran away when I recognized the cook as a strange kid I knew in elementary school.

4 movies I could watch over and over:
This question caused much consternation (is that the correct use of the word? whatever). I'm sorry, but I just could not limit it to 4.
1) Pride and Prejudice (or most Jane Austen flicks)
2) Moonstruck
3) Office Space
4) Armageddon/Independence Day. And yes, I realize that this makes me appear to be the intellectual rival of a radish.
**Honorable Mentions:
Bend it Like Beckham
The Italian Job
The Joy Luck Club
Raising Arizona

Places I have lived:
1) Kenmore, WA
2) Provo, UT
3) Sun Valley, ID (sounds cooler than Boise and I did live there for 3 months)
4) Dacono, CO

Favorite TV shows:
1) The Office
2) LOST
3) Project Runway
4) Grey's Anatomy/Ugly Betty are a tie

4 favorite foods:
This one is interesting. The one and only difference between my list and Marie's is that I like french fries just SLIGHTLY more than mashed potatoes. However, you will of course note that fries and mashed potatoes are both...potatoes. No wonder we are friends.
1) French Fries or Mashed Potatoes
2) Diet Coke (yes, in our house this is a food group)
3) Cafe Rio salad (I don't get it very often, but it makes the top 4!!!)
4) Cake. Cake. Cake. Caveat - box cake and cheap bakery cake over fancy cake any day of the week.

4 websites I visit:
1) Ebay
2) GFY (see favorite blog list)
3) People
4) My friends blogs

4 places I'd rather be:
1) The Bahamas
2) Italy
3) Lake Louise
4) California Coast

4 old boyfriends you wonder "what in the world ever happened to ____" about:
This question was of my own making. Perhaps slightly sadistic and masochistic, but an interesting exercise. And I really hope none of them ever happen to stumble on this blog (feel free to make up code names if you feel it would be prudent).
1) Billy S.
2) John M.
3) Neal S.
4) Jay L.

Here are the three people I will tag to do this next:
1) Diana
2) Carli
3) Peggers
Hey you three - consider this your offical tagging. Because I am too blurry lazy to send you an email.

Looking for Dracula...I'm not afraid!!

Perhaps I am a tad premature, but I've decided it is imperative that I decide RIGHT NOW what Addy is going to be this year for Halloween.

To refresh your memories, this is what she wore last year. And yes, I realize there are two costumes. I have issues.

So. Please vote on your fave costume on the right side of the blog. I will be taking your opinions under serious consideration, so please be sure to ponder as long as necssary. The following are the nominees, but feel free to suggest your own:

Miss Bee

I have matching Baby Legs in yellow and black stripes that really make me want to do this one. Because frankly, when else will she have a need to wear bee-striped leggings?

Pink Dronkey (Donkgon?) - see Shrek

Dumbo!! I adore the ears.

Leia

My idea was to have Ammon be Jabba the Hut, and I would be Princess Leia chained to him. Addy could be R2d2. Oddly enough, Ammon was not hip on this plan, and then of course there is the problem of the gold bikini. No one needs to see that.

My little peanut. Corny? Perhaps.

(I should have said Nutty - that would have thrown you all into a tizzy of hilarity)

And of course, Yoda. Too cruel?

Of all things....a Peep

I think this one definitely wins for originality, and we do have a history of alternately stuffing our faces with Peeps and lightning them on fire. Both activites are equally fun. I don't care what anyone says - Peeps are DELICIOUS.

Ode To My Red Shoes

O red shoes, my lovely red shoes

Before I owned you, what did I do?

You make me look stylish even when I feel fat
You make me feel happy when I want to say "Drat!"

My black pants are boring when you are not there

I love you so much, I might buy a spare

You are shiny and cute, more fun than a pap

You even have a reversible strap

My friend Marie has a pair of you too

But if someone else does I'll definitely sue

If I ever lost you, my soul would be bruised

Here's to you, my lovely red shoes

Hey Jealousy

So. Here's the deal. I know that I am really, really blessed and I would NEVER say otherwise. I married my BFF, I have a beautiful (seriously) child, wonderful house, crazy dogs, amazing family...you get the idea.
But for some reason lately, I just feel jealous of everyone around me. Mostly I am jealous of all the stay at home moms I know because they are doing all of the things that I wish I could do, and especially the most important thing....which of course is watching Ellen everyday.
I'm kidding - obviously they are with their kids which is the bestest thing any woman could do. But...they also get to go on play dates, go to the grocery store in the middle of the day (novel idea), *gasp* clean the toilet on a regular basis, write fancy blogs, go to the zoo etc., and actually cook food. And something beyond Dino Nuggets which is Addy's main source of nutrition at present.
I don't get to do any of these things and I feel a little sad.

What is it about humans that make us never satisfied with where we are? I can't think of a ton, but I'm sure there are reasons why people would be jealous of me.

I'm also jealous of everyone back in Seattle and my friends that get to hang out together, and have somehow managed to continue life without me there! How dare they. And of course, I'm jealous of all the great people here who have all of these great friendships established and do cool things. Don't get me wrong - I'm glad we moved, and we have met some fabulous people here, but it just takes time to really feel part of...I'm not sure. A group, I guess?

Am I the only one out other who has these thoughts? Perhaps. But, I made you listen to them and that makes me feel a bit better.

OK - the vomiting of all sad thoughts has ended. It's odd too that I am writing this today, because I actually had a great day. Interesting.

Loves to all. Chaw.

...so mothers be good to your daughters too...

So. I am officially My Mother's Daughter. I'm sure there are many reasons why this is true (hem hem purse obsession, return everything 3 times and buy it again, etc.), but the one major trait that is shining through the genetic pool today is to rearrange furniture. And I don't just mean move a picture frame from one side of the room to the other, but completely turn the house ON IT'S HEAD. Lemme explain.

I hope my siblings will back me up on this one, because I have the craziest memories of waking up on the occasional Saturday morning to the soothing sounds of vacuuming, furniture being dragged, and the inevitible finger being smashed. This sweet noise was always accompanied by the sight of at least one mattress in the hallway, usually two, and my mom and whichever of us poor saps who had made the mistake of waking up first and got roped in to helping grunting and sweating behind. She would literally change every single one of our rooms (4 of them). Think of it like a giant Tetris game...do we move the twin bed first or the queen? If we put Christian under the stairs, where will we put his dresser (these words were actually uttered)? Could we fit three beds in the downstairs room and make a food storage room in the spare? Will the shelves fit? And no you canNOT put the giant ceramic panther on top of your bookcase! Micaela! Take your Rick Schroeder poster down NOW!

It would have been totally lame to my 13 year old self to think that one day, I would LOVE LOVE LOOOOOOOVE to rearrange furniture as much as or more than my mom. And yet here we are. I've lived in this house now for approx. 10 months, and I have already rearranged the house twice. THE HOUSE. In sum, the only room in the house that hasn't been touched is the kitchen, and only because everything is bolted down. It was great fun, although we now have a treadmill sitting in the center of the guest room because we are both too tired to do anything about it.

I've concluded that this is what one does on the weekends when one's noodle feels underused. It feels compelled to come up with some stimulating and fulfilling mental challenge to feel like it's free time was used in a responsible way. And so that I don't have to tell people that I sat on my tuckus and watched Scrubs reruns all weekend. That is the sole reason I do anything.

Hello My Name is Addy

Disclaimer: OK, I am copying a few of you that did this, but I just thought it was a fun way to tell about your child without sounding completely obsessed.

• I am 15 1/2 months old
• My favorite color is pink
• I love to eat pizza, but I hate vegetables and fruit
• I like to eat rocks
• My favorite toys are my ball popper and my school bus
• I am a fast walker, but I still look like Frankenstein
• I love my daddy - he is the best snuggler
• I have 11 teeth (and all 4 molars!)
• I have big green/hazel eyes and very long lashes
• I love my doggies, Idgie and Lucy - I especially love to try and grab their eyeballs
• I like to throw things off the landing
• I have learned how to brush my own hair and put on my mommy's headbands
• I love to sing

I like the 4th of JulyI like wearing my visorI love looking up at my mommy on the landing

I think I am too little to eat ribs, but I had 3 anyway

I do NOT like hammocks, but I do like my friend Kyla

I like to help my daddy cook

I like to carry around my mom's housecoat

I am Adeline.

Happy Harry Potter Day!

I don't care how much you all make fun of me, because Friday night was SO AWESOME! We looked like dorks, but it was fun to be a dork again (not that I ever considered stopping). We didn't actually get our books until about 1:30am, but it was a good time to be had by all and worth the wait.




More to come soon of normal life...